Falling For You

4: ιм ғallιng ғor нιм

"Look I'm sorry alright?"

   It has been two days since I talked to Theo. Since he told me he was probably going to propose to Ruth which is going to happen most likely.

When he told me that I felt like I was stabbed in the chest. I have never really had a problem with them two dating because that made Theo happy.

But proposing to her? That's just a whole another level! He's my best friend and I just want him to be happy.

But with him getting married I don't know how I should feel. I feel hurt and upset. I hear a knock on my apartment door. I get up from my couch and I open the door.

"Hey Shai, I brought frozen Yogurt I heard what happened." Says Zoë. "Come in." I say. She shuts the door behind her. She sits down next to me on the couch.

She hands me my favorite yogurt with a spoon. I open the top and I lay it down on the coffee table. I scoop some yogurt and plop it onto my mouth.

Zoë scoops the cup of her yogurt with a spoon. "So are you and Theo dating or?."

"We are fake dating Theo came up with the idea, so we could let the paparazzi let them get what they want for a couple months and then break up so they wouldn't bother us anymore." I say. Christina plops some yogurt into her mouth.

"Wow so he just told you that he should marry Ruth or not on a fake date?" Says Zoë. "Yeah, even though we're not actually dating but that was wrong to say that to me at that time."

She nods at me. "Yeah how rude." I'm really hurt what he did to me. It's going to be so hard when I like Theo.

Oh my gosh I like Theo!

"I can't believe I'm saying this but I think I'm falling for him, for Theo." I say. Zoë squeals and she lets her yogurt cup fall to the floor. "Oh my gosh you have to tell him."

I can't tell him. He wanted to fake date me to let the paparazzi get what they want then breakup so they won't bother us anymore. Not to ruin his relationship with Ruth and make our friendship end.

"I can't tell him it will ruin everything." I say. "Well your going to have to tell him sometime before its too late!" Says Zoë.

Why would it matter if I tell him or not? He's going to get married to Ruth anyway. And what if he doesn't feel the same way about me everything will change. I can't tell him it wouldn't be a good idea.

"He's going to marry Ruth either way it's not worth it Zoë." She shakes her head at me. "Shailene woodley is never like this, she would tell a guy how she really feels."

She's right I will tell them how I actually feel. But this is different this is Theo. My best friend, my co-star and I can't ruin that between us. I mean who would?

"Zoë I don't know, I'm just really hesitant about this and I'm afraid it will ruin everything." I say. She puts her hand on my shoulder. "It wouldn't ruin everything trust me."

I should trust her. I mean what is the worst could happen? I mean Theo's my best friend. I'm sure he would understand right?

He has too. I don't know why he wouldn't. I'm being ridiculous. Zoë is right I should tell him. But I don't want to right now.

Plus I'm pissed off at him. So I don't want to tell him anything right now. And if he doesn't like me back it's his fault he should feel the guilt

Zoë is right. "Thanks." I say. She lightly punches me on the arm. "No need to thank me" she says.

》

I lay on my stomach on my bed with my chin in my pillow. I still haven't heard anything from Theo, which I am not surprised about.

I listened to Zoë's advice but I'm not sure that yet I'm going to use it yet. I mean Theo doesn't even know why I'm upset at him. He could give a necklace with pearls on it and I wouldn't accept it as a apology gift because he wouldn't know what he is saying for.

You can't just wow a girl with gifts or flowers so they will forgive you because your saying sorry. But a gift will be better than that if you know what your actually knowing what your sorry for.

Which is love and comfort.

No matter what he does to make me accept his apology will not work. Unless I get that gift which I doubt I won't get.

It sucks, I never stay long in relationships. But it's not me who ends the relationship is always the other person. And I haven't been in a relationship in years.

I hear a knock on my doorway and I see Theo standing in the doorway. He is holding flowers, I get up from my bed and I walk up to him. "How did you get inside?" I ask

"I know where your spare key is Shai, it's that simple." Says Theo. "Anyways why are you here?" I ask. It sounded a little rude when I said it.

"I just wanted to say sorry." He hands me the flowers. He doesn't even know why I'm pissed at him. I hand him the flowers back to him. He frowns at me.

"What you don't like them?" Says Theo.  "You don't even know what your saying sorry for, you have no clue!"

"Then tell me." He says. "I think you can figure it out yourself." I say. I go back to sitting on my bed. He walks over to me and touches my back.

"Don't touch me!" I shout. He backs away in a defensive way. "Shai I'm-"

"Just go." I say. He frowns at me. "Go." I say.

And he leaves

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