31. Don't be Mistaken

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This is the longest chapter so far. I hope you all enjoy it.

Saransh was everywhere

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Saransh was everywhere.

He picked me up from college, dropped me off like clockwork. Even on days when I knew his workload was crushing, he'd bring his laptop and sit beside me, typing away while occasionally glancing at me to make sure I was okay. He made sure I ate every meal—sometimes even watching me until I finished the last bite. And when I started skipping lunch again, out of habit or just to spite myself, he began packing it for me himself. A neatly packed box, still warm, would show up at college with my name scribbled on a sticky note like a gentle scolding.

And every morning—without fail—he'd kneel beside the bed and massage my feet like it was the most natural thing in the world.

Sometimes, when I looked at him, I could feel my resolve cracking, slipping away like sand through my fingers. I told myself I wouldn't let him in. That I had to stay distant. Cold. Unreachable. I wanted him to feel what I had felt. I wanted him to ache for me, to drown in that same helplessness he once left me in. I wanted to punish him.

I wanted him.

And I wanted to punish him for that, too.

But then—he'd do something simple. Thoughtful. Kind. And it would shatter me. Every gesture, every word, every damn smile—he made it harder to hold onto the bitterness I was supposed to carry. His presence didn't suffocate. It soothed.

And it was terrifying.

Because the more I let myself breathe around him, the harder it became to pretend I didn't still love him.

I was waiting for him.

It was almost time for the acupuncture physician to arrive, and as ridiculous as it sounded, I wanted him there. Something about having Saransh beside me—even during something as mundane and mildly torturous as acupuncture—made everything a little more bearable.

With a sigh, I clicked on the Submit button for my assignment. No, I didn't actually do it. Dia did. I just copied her work, made a few tweaks so it wouldn't look like a Ctrl+C Ctrl+V situation, and hit submit. I didn't have it in me to start from scratch. I never really have. I'm not the topper-type. Never was. Never wanted to be. I've always done just enough—just enough to pass, just enough to earn decent marks, just enough to keep things going without anyone raising eyebrows. That's it. That's all I've ever aimed for.

I glanced at the clock. It had been an hour since Saransh dropped me home. He'd said he had an important meeting and promised he'd be back soon.

But he wasn't back yet.

A knock on the door pulled me out of my thoughts.

A moment later, the househelp stepped into my room, eyes low with practiced grace. "Your doctor is here, Kuwarani sa," she said softly.

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