What's the Point of Living, when the best is Sleeping? [BL]

24

"You could have just said that you're not really comfortable being with us."

Jing Jian's voice was casual, soft even, but it still made Ye Ming's jaw tighten. The boy had his arm wrapped lazily around Ye Ming's slumped shoulder as they walked side by side through the hallway. The corridor was flooded with people, buzzing with noise, just like how Ye Ming's mind should have been—empty, aimless—but instead it was weighed down by thought after thought, stacking like unreturned library books.

There was no way to fix this. Not anymore.

Even if he twisted the story, rewrote the path, and set it all back to the original—what would that do now? The world didn't care about resets. What's done is done. Reality had already taken root, and even he had become real again. Unfortunately.

And what Jing Jian just said—how the hell was he supposed to tell them something like that?

It had been months. Months of tolerating the company of three incredibly overbearing men, each with their own twisted view of what affection looked like. If he opened his mouth now, would it change anything? Of course not. His opinion didn't matter to them, not really. They liked the idea of him, maybe even loved the version of him they built in their heads, but not Ye Ming—the actual person standing here, sighing internally every time someone got too close.

So, why bother saying it? Why waste saliva when the result's already scripted? They'd still laugh it off. They'd still linger. They'd still treat him like something breakable and priceless at the same time.

It was tiring. Too damn tiring.

"Where will you attend college, Ye Ming?"

The question slipped from Jing Jian's lips casually, like he wasn't waiting for a meaningful answer. And maybe that's what made Ye Ming look at him for a second longer than usual.

College.

If anything, Ye Ming had that part of his life figured out. One hundred percent—he was getting out of here. He'd planned it already. Overseas, far from these people and this city. There were shackles around him now, invisible but heavy, imposed by the three men who all claimed to care. Shackles that gripped tighter every time one of them called him, stared too long, reached out and touched his arm like it was theirs.

But unlike Bai Yu'er, Ye Ming wasn't naive enough to let himself rot in the same fate.

No. He wasn't going to let anyone rewrite his ending.

He'd watched Bai Yu'er drown herself in her second life, chasing what? Love? Redemption? Acceptance? What a joke. If this life offered you a second chance, it meant you had the responsibility to make it your own—not offer it up like a sacrifice to those who didn't deserve it.

Ye Ming knew exactly what he was capable of. And that was enough.

"Not sure," he said, his tone flat.

It wasn't a lie. He hadn't decided which country to move to, but wherever it was, it would be somewhere unreachable for all three of them.

Jing Jian didn't push. He just nodded and returned to looking forward, his arm still hanging loosely over Ye Ming's shoulder like it belonged there.

Ye Ming didn't shrug him off. It would be pointless. People like Jing Jian interpreted resistance as shyness, or worse, playfulness. If he said "no," it'd probably trigger some idiotic idea of "challenge accepted." So, he walked on, silent and simmering.

Up ahead, Li Wei was leaning against a vending machine, soda in hand, wiping sweat off his forehead with the sleeve of his uniform. His hair was more unkempt than usual, and it looked like he had just finished doing something stupid, like racing a teacher up the stairs again.