Reality || Brooklyn Beckham

Ch.22 - Congratulations

Chapter 22 -

-(B r o o k l y n ' s P O V)-

"Clary ?"

"What ... what are you doing here ..." I said literally sounds weak rather than intimidating . Awkward . I study her figure , she looks tired like really tired .

She looks at me for a few seconds and quickly turn away when our gaze met . what is she doing here ? I thought she's done with me .

She looks like she is debating with herself wether if she's going to talk or just run away from me . This just make me way more nervous than I am right now , if that's even possible .

As seconds passed she open her mouth and I just know that she's about to say something , I don't know why but I hold my breath even tho it's really unnecessary .

"Can I ... umm come in ." She answers subtly , her eyes travels around but on me . She looks nervous , and there's no other words to describe this situation rather than 'awkward' .

A millions thoughts flooding in my mind , maybe I should just say that she can't because I'm about to go to a football practice and I don't want to be late .

And with that maybe I can avoid this very awkward moment , and save this later when I'm ready to face the reality that she doesn't want anything with me . Because as hard as I don't want to admit it , I still can't face it . I don't want to believe that she actually just pretending the whole time .

"Oh sure." I said moving from my door frame gesturing her to come in . She walks quickly and as she finally stop on her spot I watch as her hand shaking slightly on each sides of her body .

I close the door behind me , I really don't know what to do right now . Should I walk to her and ask her if she wants to sit down or ?

There's this huge part of me that feels completely happy that she came here . But the other part is like this huge mix feelings , like I feel anxious , why did she came ? There must've been a reason right ? And honestly I'm afraid if she actually want to say to stay away from her and those stuff you know .

Or maybe she wants to apologize that she made me feel that she likes me when the fact is she isn't .

Why is all the reasons that I can think of right now leads to her leaving me ?

I have this little plan to actually forget about her and just move on from her , but at this very moment as I look at her it feels like I fall for her all over again . Damn it , this isn't healthy .

Get your shits together Brooklyn , she doesn't feel anything to you .

Crap , my brain telling me to back off but why the hell that the little voice inside me screaming at me that I need her , that I won't ever forget about her .

God I swear I can feel the heat in this house , every seconds passing felt so awkward . Clary moves a lot , she rubs her hand nervously and I don't even have to face her face but I know that she is nervous right now .

I walk slowly to her , debating on myself with every steps I took . every step I tok made me feel like it's getting harder and make me feel uneasy .

God if this going to be like what I thought please make it somehow less painful for me . Just please .

-( C l a r y ' s P O V )-

God , Oh my freaking God . Shit . holly crap . what am I doing here .

Stop Clary , get your shits together this needs to be done . Breathe , in ... and out ....

Okay one more time . Beeathe ... in.... and out ....

"Brooklyn I ... I ... " I muttered . This is too hard I can't even talk properly , I can't .

My tongue get tied I really can't say anything , come on Clary you need to . Just say it why the hell is it so hard to talk . I even have scripted down all of my dialog . I've practiced it , I've memorized it .

But all of sudden I forgot about whatever I have wrote in that papers that I've tossed before coming into Brooklyn's house . Oh I'm so fuck up .

If only I didn't throw away that paper right in front of Brooklyn's door , right before I'm coming in . Maybe I wouldn't stuck in here and don't say anything .

Brooklyn's probably think I'm a creep now . A girl coming in to your house and asking if she can comes inside and then she doesn't do anything but rubbing her hands nervously .

I probably should go back , I'm such a wimp . I can't even say some words that I've planned before coming . I'm such a coward .

I watch as Brooklyn's expression change in a mixture of surprise , curiosity , and much more that I can't even explain . What the hell , I can't even think properly .

My mind gone mess like a million thoughts suddenly flooding my brain that make me feel like it's going to explode at any second .

I open my mouth trying to say something again but I don't know why my stupid self decide to hold my breath , this isn't healthy , this isn't healthy . I may going to faint .

"I'm umm ... I'm so- ... I'm sorry ... that ... I- ..."

I pause at this moment shit Clary . This shouldn't be so hard , you just need to talk . You did that everyday , why can't you now ?

Just talk , just talk come on .

My mind really can't think properly that I'm afraid what I'm going to say may be something that I'm going to regret later .

"Brooklyn .... I umm ... I'm-" I stop again exhaling my breath that I've been holding . Please stop panicking Clary , please stop .

I can't do this .

"I'm sorry that - ... That - ... I'm wasting your time right now , I should just- ... I should just leave."

I turn around and start walking , well practically I'm half running . As I finally made my way outside , I close the front door making sure Brooklyn doesn't follow me .

I take a deep breath as I finally manage to breath again , huff . My heart beating loudly and it won't stop beating so fast that I'm afraid it might just explode .

Congratulations ! Congratulations Clary , for being the dumbest person ever that can't even manage to say a few words that she had been wrote down on a paper and memorized it over night whilst practicing it over and over again .

Great , your only chance to fix all of this is gone . and it's all because your abnormal reaction when it comes to Brooklyn . oh this is just great .

You know what else make me feel bad ? He didn't follow me outside , Brooklyn didn't follow me .

Probably he's done with me , I shouldn't have come in the first place . Change of plans : forget about Brooklyn Beckham , you don't deserve a second chance

-:-:-:-

(A/N)

I just realized that this chapter was cut , and it's after one day I uploaded :( sorry .

IF YOU GO BACK AND READ THE ACTUAL ENDING THANK YOU SO MUCH ILY :)

By the way if you're looking for a Romeo's fanfic you guys should check 'Oh Hi' by Mitsy3 :) I know that'd means a lot to her .

Thank you for 3 k :) I'll update as fast as I can :)

Oh if this chapter actually get like 20 votes I promise to update tomorrow ;) which I know it won't happen bc 20 ?! HAHA