Depression Doesn't Mean Self Harm.

Meet your sister and brother!!

I woke up the next morning to expect to leave my house like every morning and head out to school but instead I awoke to the same room, same bed, same door and same girl.

I think I'm tired of living life I might as well not live it at all, I thought . I began humming to myself. I couldn't cry anymore all my tears had been shed already, I had no more family my parents had disowned me, no more friends all the ones I had now thought I was crazy and a 'almost' murderer.

I heard a buzz noise coming from the speaker. I inhaled and exhaled deeply. Today is the day that I'll be discharged and brought to a new family. I had spent almost three months here, trying to gain back the life I had lost.

Nobody ever came to visit me, well my mom did once but she said all of my friends either forgot who I was or thought less of me, three months ago I would've cried myself to sleep thinking about how much of a monster I really am, how broken I was.

But now broken is no longer in my vocabulary but fixed is.

"Good morning Sophia, a nurse is coming in to give you your medicine now". I attempted to sit up straight on the bed, my feet were locked to the end of the bed but after a few weeks of me staying here they set my arms free.

The locks started removing from the big grey door and a tiny women came in holding a tray of needles in her hands. I hated getting my shots. I was diagnosed with diabetes and bipolar disorder after the second month. I thought I was going to die here because I was really really depressed but my doctor kept telling me that life's gonna get better and that I shouldn't worry myself.

The lady sat at the edge of the bed starting of with one needle, tablet, needle, tablet, check blood pressure and another needle and she left.

I wanted to shout after her, to stay with me and not leave me, I was really lonely, because I never smiled, creases started forming on my forehead, to be honest I didn't even do anything here I only responded my simply nodding or shaking my head. My doctor even believes that I forgot how to talk, I don't even know if I remember how too.

"Sophia the medicine takes five minutes to kick in your system, during that period of time you will get dressed and be led to the waiting room.

I wanted to cry, I was finally leaving, I've never actually stood up, any time I needed to pee someone would come in and inject something in me that would make me sleep.

Thirty seconds later two women came in, stripped me naked and started dressing for me, I wanted to tell to stop that I could do it myself, but I didn't know how to tell them.

After that awful experience of having one of them touch my chest and lower part by 'mistake' I was then bed ridden down to the wait room for people leaving this hell on earth.

I was also told that my new family would come and collect me and bring me to my new home. I was really excited but extremely scared at the same time, I didn't know what to expect out of these people, will they treat me like my parents or better.

I started getting up from my bed but sadly fell onto the floor, the two women picked me up from both sides and placed me on the wheelchair.

"Your legs need to get used to you walking, they think they're still on vacation" the ginger woman said breathing a laugh, the blonde woman smiled at me a bit and squeezed my arm "Vacations coming to an end for them, you'll be walking perfectly by the end of the week".

I gave her a small smile 'Today's freaking Tuesday' I wanted to say but I couldn't. After about four minutes a tall man and woman came walking in, they looked like a gorgeous couple with big money in the pockets, I prayed they were my adoptive parents but they continued until they walked right past me.