Lost in Hollywood

Through Glass

Monday morning came, bright and clear, and with it, the last week of school.

Sky sat in the car, staring at the big, bold letters on the wall - West Valley High School - and her stomach clenched tight with anxiety. With trembling hands, she gripped the straps of her backpack, took in a deep breath, and—

Nothing.

The strength she needed to get out of the car, didn't exist. Her fingers wouldn't grab the handle and open the door. Her backpack lay on her feet, and her heart ticked in her throat.

Funny, how you never got used to anxiety. One would have thought that with all the experience Sky had with that emotion, would have helped her to conquer it, but apparently, it did not. Every time, it felt like dying. Her palms were sweaty, she feared she would be sick, she craved for pills. Hell, even if it was just one pill, to calm her heartbeat, to clear her head, just one fucking pill so that she could get this done and over with—

Because she knew this day would be Hell. What else could it be? This whole week would be Hell. And hadn't she walked through the fire enough times already? Why did she have to do it all over again, and with no help whatsoever?

There were hundreds of kids rushing towards the front doors, a whirlwind of colors, of laughter, their smiles and their voices filled with the restless energy of the last week of school. And here she was, slumping down in her seat, looking at them through the glass, a fish in a tank, an outsider, never fitting in.

She didn't have to be a psychic to know exactly what would happen.

They would stare at her, like she was some kind of freak. Hushed silences, talking behind her back, whispers, snickering. Mean notes stuffed into her locker. Someone pushing her down the stairs. A milk carton poured over her head, maybe. Her backpack thrown into the trash, because in their minds, it was all her fault.

Sky was well aware that by now, the news of what Kyler had done at the party was circulating widely on social media - and with them, the rumors of what Sky must have done, to make him lose his shit like that.

It was always the girl's fault.

No matter what had really happened, no matter that Kyler was in jail, that there was a court date waiting for them in September, and Sky's attorney Sebastian kept assuring her there was no way Kyler would walk free— that there was enough evidence against him to put him behind bars for decades, but still—

Sky knew.

To Kyler's friends, it would always be her fault.

It would be just like with Matt, and his friends. Even shooting a girl dead in the school, hadn't been enough to convince their peers that he was the villain of the story. It would be a fucking miracle if anyone here saw things any differently.

"You don't have to go, if you don't want to," said Dad softly, and Sky turned to look. She swallowed the lump in her throat, to keep her voice even.

"I'll go. Just give me a moment."

"Take all the time you need."

Dad's fine hands rested on the wheel, his face was calm but Sky noticed the lines around his eyes, his mouth, that were carved there by all the worrying and sorrow of this goddamned year. Her heart hurt, and she had to look away. It was almost easier to look at the school, at the kids swarming in through the front doors, than to see how much Dad had aged because of her and her stupid choices.

"I could always take you for a milkshake instead," Dad suggested, after a minute or so. "You've already passed all your exams. No one's going to care if you attend school this week or not."

Sky let out a short huff that felt almost like laughter. "You're my Dad. Isn't it your job to make sure I go to school and stuff?"

"It's my job to make sure you're safe, and well, and happy," Dad said rather dryly. "And in that, I have pretty much failed. So if you'd rather skip school, and have a milkshake, I'm all for it."

"So, screw the rules, huh?" Sky muttered, fidgeting with the hem of her skirt - too short, too pink. Her thighs felt bare. She should have worn jeans.

"What's that?"

"Nothing." A short silence. "Just something Kat used to say."

"Oh. Well, it does sound like her."

"And you haven't failed," Sky continued, turning to look at Dad again, meeting his green eyes that were so much like her own. "You're the best Dad anyone could ever ask for, okay? I'm the one who sucks, and we both know it."

"Oh, Sky—" Dad's voice turned raspy, as if he had something in his throat. "No, you don't. You are a very brave girl, and I am proud of you. I love you, always. You know that, right?"

Sky knew, but she also knew she wouldn't be able to stop her tears if this conversation continued for one second more. She could barely take it as it was. Besides, if she was going to make it to homeroom, she would need to hurry.

"Hey, no chick-flick moments. I don't have time for this," she said, and grabbed her backpack, opened the door before she could get second thoughts, before she could lose her courage.

"Chick-flick moments?" Dad asked, arching a brow. "More from Kat?".

"Yeah. Thanks for the ride,"

Sky stepped out of the car and walked away without looking back, her back straight, her chin up. The strap of her backpack chafed the scar on her bad shoulder, and the sun was hot on her neck, so exposed now without the familiar weight of her heavy curls. She was raw, naked, exposed. Scared. And yet, she kept walking. One step at a time, toward the front doors. The school bell was ringing, almost everyone was in already. She was the last one on the yard, and oh, her steps were so slow, faltering, weak. Her leg was dragging behind worse than in a long time. But still, she kept walking. Even without looking, she knew Dad was waiting to see if she'd change her mind, if she would stop, turn around, ask him to take her back home. She didn't. Her steps might be slow, but her mind was determined. She felt Kat by her side, almost hand in hand, and she knew: all the worst things she could imagine had already happened. There was nothing this school, these kids, could do to her, that would be worse than what she had been through before. She was still standing. She was a fighter. She was a—

And then she saw him, standing by the doors, a slim, hunched figure in faded jeans and a grey T-shirt, his hands stuffed deep in the pockets of his jeans.

Eli.

Sky's heart skipped a beat. He was here. She wasn't alone. She didn't have to do this without any help.

He straightened his back and met her eyes, his throat bobbed visibly at the sight of her. His nervous hands flew out of his pockets.

"You came," he rasped. "I wasn't sure if you would."

"I wasn't sure if you would."

His eyes took in her pale face, her sleepless eyes, the nervous tremble of her legs, and he stepped closer. The school bell was still ringing, as he reached a hand for her, and she took it.

"Hey, it's gonna be okay," he said. "I'm here. I've got you."

"Right back at you."

That was all that needed to be said. They walked in through the doors, hand in hand, sweaty palms gluing together, fingers entwining, and Sky knew.

This school couldn't burn her down. She would rise from her ashes, once more, as many fucking times as it would take, because—

She was the Phoenix.

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Sorry, I know it's been ages since I last updated. Life has been so hard lately. No promises of a future update, but please know, I haven't forgotten this fic or you guys. I love you all.

Please, vote and comment. ❤️🙏🏻