Through The Dark

Five

I take her hand and continue the walk down the beach, staying silent. I didn't want to tell her the truth. Of course, I wanted kids. I've always wanted to be a dad. I just wasn't ready. Honestly, I'm scared more than anything.

"So?" She asks again as we swing our hands back and forth.

"Yeah...eventually." I look away from her.

"How long is eventually?" She huffs.

"Maybe five years." I shrug. She huffs agains and stays quiet. Wrong answer I assume.

We continue to walk down the beach, until we get to back to our hotel. "Ready for bed again?" She says as I unlock the door. I reply with a swift yes and walk into the bathroom. She stands next to me and begins to undress.

It has been a long, busy three days. The wedding, family coming to visit, flying to Greece. Everything has worn me out, despite the fact that I woke up less than four hours ago. I was ready to sleep again.

She starts the shower and steps in, letting the water fall down her exposed body. I slowly take my shirt off, letting it fall to the ground, before I slip out of my shorts. Just as she peaks out at me, she curves her finger up at me to draw me closer. "Lemme get that.." I say as she reaches for the shampoo bottle. I take it from her hands and lather a dab into her hair. She leans back as I massage it into her short hair. "That too..." I point to the body wash. I drop a bit into my palms, before slowly rubbing down her body. I rub her back, massaging a little as I go. After, I turn her around, running my hands down her chest, probably lingering there longer than I should. Soon, she pulls us both under the stream of hot water. I can feel my back redden as the water drenches the two of us. She runs a dab of shampoo through my hair. She washes my body, as I did hers.

This was different. This wasn't sex at all. Of course not. There wasn't even any sexual tension. This was just the two of us spending an intimate moment together. Besides the water, it was silent. We've never done this before. I admire everything about her. The way the water drips down her face, off her shoulder, and to the floor. The way she ran her hands through her hair with her eyes closed tight. She shuts off the water and reaches for the towel. We both step out and I quickly dry myself, before laying down in our bed. Soon after, she joins me and cuddles in.

"Can we talk about babies again?" She questions and I roll my eyes.

"Sure. What do you wanna know?"

"I don't want to wait that long." She says with a pout. All the intimate feelings I just had faded away. I sigh and pull her in a little closer.

"It'll be fine. You just turned 23, I'm almost 27. We have time." I could picture us having kids in the next few years. Not anytime soon. I wanted to enjoy the first year of marriage before I risk her dying. I know I'm probably being crazy. What happened with Perrie was very rare. I just don't want to risk it. I almost lost her once and it's not happening again.

"Yeah when our baby is 13, you'll be forty. Do you want to wait any longer?!" I laugh and roll my eyes once again.

"That is so normal!" I say back.

"All I'm saying is, I want babies soon. Not now. Maybe in a year. Defiantly not five!" She raises her voice.

"And all I'm saying is that we're waiting! And you're delusional! Get some sleep." I roll over, pushing my back against hers. Eventually, we both drift off to sleep.