Entry #23

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Dear Autumn,

Today I had a rather... eye-opening discussion with my therapist.

It was more of a one-sided discussion, but what she said hit too close to home.

When she saw that I was being unresponsive again (I really didn't want to speak) she started asking me if I would be happy if March had to grow up without me.

I was surprised how she knew about her in the first place, but the doctor told her about my outing yesterday (I'm really starting to hate him).

And after a while I shook my head. She said if I keep refusing to eat food and throwing up what little I do eat, I'm going to be useless (I'm eating too much).

Those were her exact words.

And I knew I was useless, and worthless, and everything else your friends have ever called me.

But she was saying that I would be useless to March. Which means I won't be able to be the brother I want to be. Which means my little sister might get hurt.

And I really don't want that Autumn, I really don't.

I feel like I'm going to cry so I'm going to stop writing now.

See you later,
August 

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