Entry #50

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Dear Autumn,

You tried again today. You persuaded me to go out although all I wanted to do was stay in bed all day. But I went out anyway, because it was hard to say no to you.

And then we went on a picnic. You brought all the food, and you even played our favorite music through your iPod.

You tried to make me eat, but not as hard as last time. I had a feeling you wanted to push me to eat more, but you also wanted to make things better between us. And I appreciate that.

Because I know that I'm the one who should've done all this. I'm the one who should've tried to make things better and took you to go on a picnic. I'm not supposed to be like the weak boy I am.

And I'm sorry. Because there are a lot of things that I want to do for you but I can't.

And one of these things is saying that I love you too when you whispered those 35 I love yous in my ear.

I don't know why, but I couldn't say it.

Maybe I was just too tired.

August



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