One direction preferences

10. You Attempt Suicide

WARNING MAY BE TRIGGERING WARNING

Harry: You didn't write a note. You didn't think of everyone you'd be leaving behind. You didn't think about anything, other than the bottle of antidepressants in your hands. You sat on the cold tiled floor of yours and Harry's shared bathroom, tears spilling silently from your eyes. You poured a handful of the pills into your hand, and swiftly tossed them all into your mouth. Swallowing hard, you made sure every last one had gone down. You couldn't understand how you had gotten to this point, it were as if you had just snapped. You felt as if you were brining everyone in your life down, you were worthless to them, and this was the only solution. Time passed slowly before you began to feel the effects of the drugs in your system. Harry wouldn't be home for hours, and surly that would be enough time for the drugs to do their job. Dizzy, you stand to your feet, wanting to give yourself one last glance in the mirror. You can't bring yourself to look up, as you clutch the sink with sweaty palms. You can feel yourself losing your senses, and suddenly, your eyes roll to the back of your head, and your frail body slams to the floor. Harry calls out your name upon his early arrival, a bouquet of white lilies in his hands. He calls your name a few more times, as he casually slips off his jacket, though it remains quiet. Slightly confused, Harry makes his way to the your master bedroom, and with the bathroom door slightly ajar, he can see your unconscious form. A string of curse words spill from his lips as he runs to your body, noticing your blue lips and empty pill bottle. With wide eyes, Harry cradles your crumpled form, as he tries to coax you out of your unconscious state, but to no avail.

Louis: The bath water was cold, but for some reason you didn't mind. With your nose just above the water, you stared down at your slit wrists. Blood seeped from the deep cuts, mixing with the water leaving it tinted pink. Your thoughts growing fuzzy, you struggle to remember who or what exactly had pushed you to this point. You thought back to Louis, and your heart hurt thinking about all of the pain you had caused him. Fans had resented you, management disapproved of you, and even though Louis and the other lads had tried so hard to shield you from it, the hate had began to chip away at you. You were always the sensitive one, always taking what people said to heart, and this is where that road had lead you to. With the cold water becoming more and more tinted with your crimson blood, you felt yourself drifting away, and for the first time in ages, you actually felt at peace. Louis pounds on the bathroom door, just now noticing how long you've been in the bath. You're too weak to respond, and instead you slide down further into the water, letting out the air in your lungs, watching as it bubbled to the surface before closing your eyes. Louis is calling your name, pounding on the locked door whilst growing more and more worried with each passing moment. Finally Louis forces the door down, cursing as he stumbles into the bathroom. When his eyes see you, sunken in water mixed with your own blood, Louis lets out a gasp. Frantically he pulls your body from the icy cold water, and cruses as he attempts to stop the bleeding at both of your wrists.

Liam: When the word got out that you were Liam's new bird, the fans, management, and even the boy's were shocked. You were nothing like Liam, the two of you were polar opposites. But some say opposites attract, and that's how it was with you and Liam. You had never experienced a man like him before, Liam had actually treated you like a human being. Maybe it was because you hadn't really ever had things easy, and because of that you had turned cold as ice. You were rough around the edges, unfitting to society, and you danced to the beat of a different type of drum. Liam had always been the innocent one and to the fans, you were the one who was corrupting him. You took a deep breath, in and out, your eyes adjusting the the flashing lights of color as they swirled around you. The club was foggy with thick smoke and the smell of sex and sweat. You had just returned from the restroom, where you had snuck a few bumps of coke, and popped a few pills, all in hopes of finally letting go. Stepping out of the crowded bathroom, Liam's hands find your waist and you jump at his touch. With hardly open eyes, and a racing heart, Liam can see you have taken something, and he panics. "(Y/N)? What have you taken? Tell me what you took?" He knew you weren't yourself lately, but nothing in his being suspected drug use. You couldn't find your voice, your tongue feeling like dead weight in your mouth. Liam curses as you lose your balance and collapse into his arms. "Let me go Liam. I want to die." Liam holds you, his jaw dropping at your words, before your eyes flutter closed and your body goes limp.

Niall: When Niall left for tour, his attention was always on the fans, and you loved that. He was always about the fans, and making the best music possible, all while enjoying the dream life with his best mates. But where did that leave you? With a big, empty apartment and lonely nights in the bed you once shared with your boyfriend. Sure, he'd call. A lot at first, but as the tour continued on, Niall became even more busy. Soon enough you'd only hear from him a few times a week. You wanted to be happy for him, you wanted to be supportive, but it was becoming harder and harder. Niall was the only constant in your life. When a week had passed and you hadn't heard from Niall once, you broke down into tears right in the middle of your kitchen. A break up was coming, you could feel it. And then what would you do? You would have absolutely no one in this world. The mere thought of being alone was enough to make you pour yourself a drink. When the alcohol burned your throat and warmed your belly, you felt peaceful, and that's all you had been wanting for so long now. So one after the other, you downed bottle after bottle after bottle, until you couldn't even tell if it was alcohol you were drinking anymore. Your vision was so blurry, you stumbled throughout your flat, your hands searching for your phone. After a few failed attempts you're able to dial Niall's number. You just want to say goodbye. Slumping to the floor, the phone slips from your hands just as Niall's voice cheerfully blares from the speaker. Your eyes closed slowly, and you could feel your heart just barely beating. A smile tugged at your lips as you finally felt happy, slowly things faded and you were so thankful