Please Stay

Chapter Three

Chapter Three

Louise saw no reason why Will wouldn't be happy about it, and neither could I. I had a cup of tea with Louise, which made me feel sick. And then I stepped out to make my way home. I decided that I would tell Will tonight over dinner.

I text Holly and Keira the good news but told them not to publise it. I didn't want to tell my family. I had the crazy idea of walking in with a bump. I didn't have a bump yet. When would my bump surface? I wasn't one to have a flat stomach, last time I'd had one of them I was around 12.

I had such a spring in my step as I walked home. I just couldn't believe it had finally happened to me. I wanted to take another test to be sure. But what if it came up negative? Nah! I was pregnant, definately, I knew it in my soul!

I got in, did some cleaning and put on tea. I logged onto the computer and searched for a due date calculator. I discovered that my due date would be the 12th November. I'd been paranoid about being pregnant since Will's birthday and so I'd made a date of when I'd started bleeding. I then grinned to myself. I won't be taking the pill tomorrow morning. I'd be turning 20, and I'd be 5 months pregnant. My head was going wild thinking of it all.

I'd always hoped this day would come. I'd dreamed about becoming a Mummy almost every day, but I'd been ignoring the thoughts for so, so long. It wasn't just the idea of having a baby, and it definately wasn't about the cute clothes, it was about the idea of being a Mum; loving and caring for somebody who is dependant on you, watching them grow, being there for them. I knew it would be very difficult, and I was starting to fear that now, but excitement was kicking the fear out of the window.

I came off the computer before I searched anymore things concerning my pregnancy, just in time, because Will walked through the door looking irritated. Maybe tonight wasn't the night to tell him.

"You okay love?" I asked. He nodded with a grunt, "I've got a pasta bake in the oven."

"That's cool babe," He smiled, and flopped onto the sofa. But it was so clear that he was in a bad mood. I guess that working on a Sunday can do that to you.

"You've got tomorrow off haven't you?" I asked.

"Have I knackers! Haven't got a day off until next weekend. I think you need to up your hours at work because this rent is just too much for me to do alone," He sighed, "Could you, babe?"

"Well, yeah," I said, my heart sinking a little - but then I realised that working more hours would enable me to buy my little prince or princess all that he needed. I knew that all the stuff would come upto about £1000, and that was before they were born!

"You don't have to be so pissy about it. It's not 1934 y'know, women can work too. You need to in this economy!" He spat. I had to get up and walk into the kitchen, I was so close to crying.

"I wasn't been pissy! I was thinking of upping my hours anyway, but there's no need to talk to me like that!" I yelled, although my last word caught in my throat. I checked the pasta bake, and stud up and looked at the oven for a good five minutes. I definately couldn't see me telling him tonight. I started crying. I heard him storm up the stairs. You're 26 mate, storming off upstairs ain't exactly acting your age!

I knew that the pasta bake would take another fifteen minutes, so I decided to go upstairs and see what was wrong with him. He doesn't speak to me like that when he's in a general bad mood - there had to be something!

"You need to tell me what's wrong?" I said, hovering at our bedroom door and he stripped down to his boxers.

"Nothing's wrong with me!" He snapped.

"Clearly there is," I said calmly, trying not to raise my stress levels, "And you need to tell me instead of biting my head off, love."

"Come here," He said softly, and so I went to stand next to him. My stomach knotted a little because he was only wearing his pants and my mind was going 'phwoaar', my heart race increased. Well, my libido hasn't gone south. "Nothing is wrong with me honey, I'm just stressed out with working so much. I really need you to go full time. I didn't want you to, but it seems that finance is working out that way."

"I need to get a fulltime job anyway babe," I smiled. He pulled my hands to his chest, kissing my lips softly. And in a swift moment, I was sat over his legs on the bed kissing him. I felt guilty; I needed to tell him that I was pregnant but I simply couldn't. I left multiple kisses around his neck, and almost forgot about my guilt seconds later, but I definately forgot about my guilt minutes later.

.

The fire alarm broke our half asleep, after-sex day dreaming. I jumped up, covering up as Will ran downstairs, throwing his towelling robe around him.

The pasta bake was cremated and thrown in the bin.

"It's takeaway night tonight!" He grinned.

"That's fine with me," I smiled, putting the kettle on.

"Have you got something to tell me!? Josie?"

I looked at him and he was looking in the bin. I saw how the pasta had tipped the magazine on it's side, revealing the pregnancy test.

"I wanted to tell you over dinner, you came in... in a bad mood. That one says negative. The other one didn't. I should take another," I started crying. He didn't look happy at all, "I wanted to tell you when you were in a good mood..."

"You just had sex with me? Didn't the whole being pregnant thing stop you!?"

"I... It's not like you can't have sex when your pregnant... That's not the point babe. I didn't want to tell you til tomorrow or something. I have obviously had sex whilst I was pregnant before I knew. Why has the sex got anything to do with it?"

"How on earth have you got pregnant!?"

"You know I take the pill religiously..."

"Whatever!"

"Why are you so mad?"

"Why am I so mad!? I'm mad because you didn't think to tell me straight away!"

"Don't be mad at me," I said, my voice barely a whisper. And I walked away and went upstairs to lay on our bed to calm down. I knew how dangerous stress was in pregnancy.

How could he not be ready for this? We'd been together for nearly 3 and half years? We were living together? We loved each other... didn't we? He was 26, not exactly a child...

Maybe he was just shocked. I hoped he was just shocked. It wasn't the ideal reaction. But hopefully he'd come around to it. And we'd laugh about this... one day... hopefully.