The Girl With Blue Diary #Wattys2015

Chapter 19 : The Journals

I learnt that life is not about enjoying our heart out. Its about enjoying in a right way that helps us grow in a right way. ~ Aariz ahmed.

.....Aariz's POV....

I started reading the random journal where i spotted my name. That was quite unbelievable. Why would aliyah write about me? why would she write about someone whom she hates. Probably the hate story i guess!

journal : Dated : Friday

Blessed day is here. But there is nothing good about today. I am broken. , literally. It has been 1 week after my birthday. Yesterday was the worst day of my life. Those boys.. They played with me and my modesty. I am writing to you as tears fall. It was my fault, i went inside the old cabinet, i thought it would be adventurous. It was Hell. Joseph and other guys were in there, In that cabinet. Allah y you didnot protected me?? And he approached me, he played with my hijab. He tried removing it. I have bitten his hand. He got enraged and other boys joined in. I saw aariz, Atleast he was a Muslim he should have protected me?? I am expecting the impossible. Later, the peon came and i was relieved. I dont want this to be engraved to my mind. I want to forget this forever. I dont even dare to meet the principal. Should I ? Should not I?

I paused after reading the journal,And took a deep breathe. The incident was much clear infront of my eyes, It gave me goosebumps. She expected that i would protect her. And i was there like a bastard enjoying the scene as they played with her modesty before my eyes, enjoying, as she was going through hell.

I let out a deep sigh with my neck bend backwards, my eyes staring at the ceiling. I could feel my eyes go wet, i closed my eyes tightly resisting my inner irreristible desire to cry.

I closed the diary. And as my inner demons talked, i again opened it. But the angelic side of mine wanted to know aliyah. I wanted to know about her, though this is not the right way.But i couldnot resist myself, I began reading the journals, the very first one to begin.

Journal : Dated : Saturday.

I am hating it. why mom has to do this always.? I hate parties. parties sucks. Dad never listens to me. There is this idiotic party being organised by mom for the new project dad is going to start. Whatever it is , the work dad does is not right. though he is selective in doing the advertisements and stuff that are like legal and halal. but allahu alam. Have to fake smiles again.
My badluck ... my disability.

I pondered over it for sometime.and turned the page to read other journals.

Journal : dated : Thursday.

I am crying to bed. I hate everything. I hate college and people overthere. They are mad!!? Why Do they ask the same question everytime. you cannot walk? I can walk , u know i like to sit in this wheel chair becoz i luv it. huh. idiots. I am bound to this wheelie just because of poliomyelitis. I care least explaining to them. My badluck.... my Disability.

I felt really bad about this. I never knew that disabled people go through all this. We may formally or casually ask them that why they couldnot walk. But it tears them apart, so deep that we couldnot even imagine.

journal : dated : Thursday.

I looooovveee Naaaanu. she is my life. i am thankful to lord that he has blessed me with naanu. She really takes care of me , since always. i owe her alot. may Allah bless her with best. And mom ? i hate the way she becomes so cheesy. infact both dad and mom after coming from day long work, behave as if they really love me. They dont. I know they dont love me. All parents are busy but mine are super busy. Argh. My badluck.. My disability.