The Badger And The Snake; Phan/Harry Potter AU

Seventeen: Promises

"I do love you."

The words rang through Phil's mind, over and over again, at a thousand miles per hour. He was so ecstatic, so overjoyed, that Dan could look him in his completely black eyes and admit he loved him. Dan loved him! His lip's edges turned upward without him meaning to, and he could feel his cheeks reddening. He was no where near as a flushed as Dan, though.

"Oh," said Phil, trying not to smile but failing miserably.

"Yeah," said Dan awkwardly, not looking at him but gripping his hands.

Phil's heart was pumping out of his chest - figuratively, of course - but he didn't know what to say. He gripped Dan's pale hands, thinking of what to do. "That's nice, but, uh. No. You don't." That would be rude! "Yeah, okay, whatever you say, Dan." Ditto. "I love you, too." No. No no no no no no.

I mean. Yes. I do. I do love him. But. Do I? Do I even know how to love someone? No. Why am I even doubting this? I love Dan with all my heart. I know he doesn't love me the way I love him. And he probably never will. Not much to look at, I am. Or talk to. Or be friends with. I mean, we're dating but does he really? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

He didn't know what to say, so he just leaned in without thinking and kissed him.

And the rest of world froze. In that moment, it was just them. Two fourteen year old wizards kissing in the very end of the nurse's wing, one of them a vampire. It was an odd situation, but they were kissing like there was no tomorrow. It didn't even get deep. Strictly lips.

Dan knew for a fact that Phil's lips, cheeks and hair were the softest in the world. Softer than any velvet or cloth, softer than the shade of blue his eyes used to be. It felt like he had taken a ten-hour bath but instead of water he had used baby oil. Phil was a soft person. They sat there kissing for a while shyly until finally Phil broke it. He smiled at the other boy then started laughing.

"What?" Dan asked. He turned an even darker shade of red, if that were possible. He looked like he had run up and down all of the moving stairs twice.

Phil shook his head, then grabbed both sides of Dan's face, gripping his cheeks and placing his forehead against the other.

"Promise me you'll stay," Dan whispered quickly. "Promise me you'll hold on and stay strong and that you'll do everything in your power to stay here with me."

Phil was taken aback with the sudden rush of words flowing from Dan's mouth, but he only chuckled. "I'm not going anywhere."

His eyelids lilted, like a flower that hadn't seen sunlight for ages.

If Phil were a flower, Dan thought, he'd be a blue hydrangea.

He remembered that those were his mothers's favourites. Every day he could after Muggle school, he would stop by the park and pick one for her, and she would kiss his cheek and wear it in her hair for the rest of the day.

I wonder what she did with all those flowers. His eyes are the same colour as hers. Wait, what? That's gay. Also, why am I comparing my boyfriend to my mom?

As Phil's eyelids fluttered shut, he whispered. "You're so cute. But I'm so tired. To be continued?"

Dan kissed his eyelids then nodded. Remembering that Phil couldn't see him, he whispered, "To be continued," only to see that Phil had already fallen asleep.

_________

The next day, Dan visited the nurse's wing enough times to annoy the nurse herself. In the morning to say hello to Phil, in the afternoon to have lunch with him, and in the evening to chat until the nurse informed him that visiting hours were over but they would begin again at 9am. Dan figured if he had some free time before his next period, he could sneak Phil a chocolate frog or some left over pumpkin juice. Phil most definitely didn't mind the extra snacks, not to mention the amazing company Dan provided. Phil had had a boring day all day until Dan came, chatting about what they had done in Herbology, complaining about the new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher or joking about Care of Magical Creatures. Phil wished Professor Longbottom would hurry the concoction up. The 48 hours are almost up, he thought to himself.

He couldn't bear to think what Dan would say or do if Phil stayed that way forever.

He could hear everything Madam Pomfrey whispered about him to her nurse's assistants. His hearing had increased magnificently. He could hear the kids outside playing Quidditch; the cheer of the crowds, the zoom of the brooms, the referee blowing their whistle. His eyesight had also gotten better. That's one thing he didn't want to change. How great would it be to never need glasses or contacts for the rest of his life? Maybe I should rethink drinking that potion.

The second day after the 'Incident,' after lunch and Dan had left for DADA, Professor Longbottom finally ran up the wing and located Phil. He sprinted to his bed, his face flushed and obviously winded - those stairs were absolute rubbish, Dan thought - and practically threw the tall tube at him. The actual chemical was a bright orange color, still bubbling inside the warm tube as though he had just finished. And he probably just had, by the looks of the professor.

Phil expressed his gratitude at the teacher's relatively speedy work, and drank the potion slowly as instructed by the professor. Phil noticed he had large front teeth. The chemical had a sour taste at first, but once it reached the back of his throat, it tasted like pumpkin and various spices. "Interesting," he said, grinning. His grin was wiped off his face when he felt the overwhelming exhaustion take over his body. His eyelids closed almost immediately after he had muttered the word and he felt sleep take him.

He had a dream.

He was falling, and everything around him was brown. He panicked, flailing around and trying to see below him. He felt like he was being sucked into a dark brown vortex, and he was surrounded by anxiety. When he finally fell he landed hard on his ass and he felt he broke something. He stood up, looking around him. Dan was there, ten or so feet ahead of him, standing completely still. They seemed to be on a race track of some sort but the grass was not green. It was black. He wasn't smiling or even looking in Phil's direction. He had his back towards Phil. He wanted to tap his shoulder or something to get his attention but before he could raise himself off the ground, Dan suddenly turned around jumped on top of Phil, pushing his head to hit the hard concrete, Phil muttering profanity in pain. Dan kissed his neck, leaving a mark. Phil blushed and felt the heat rush to that spot below his jaw but before he could say anything Dan kissed his mouth. It was harsh, not caring. Nothing like the other kisses they had shared. Dan was even kissing with his eyes open. They were not brown like what Phil saw when he was falling. They were completely black, much like how he imagined a demon to look like. Not even the part that surrounded the eye was white. Dan broke free, grinned down at the boy them sunk his apparently razor sharp teeth down on his neck.