The Badger And The Snake; Phan/Harry Potter AU

Twenty-Two: The Department of Mysteries.

LISTEN I haven't read OotP in like two years I'm not even kidding if I mess up,, PM me and tell me what to fix, I really appreciate it!! Also, I literally just went on Harry Potter Wiki for stuff I couldn't remember. Thanks :)) Also, happy holidays! 🎅

"Daniel, would you like to . . . Be attended to?"

"A little bit, yeah," said the younger boy, sarcasm practically dripping off his words.

The headmaster's lips straightened into a single, wrinkly line but wordlessly made a Patronus and sent it to Madam Pomfrey so as to avoid making Dan take the long walk to the Hospital Wing.

"Would either of you care to explain what happened?"

"Okay, um," started Phil, his voice still shaking because of what happened. "We were in the abandoned girl's lavatory," - McGonagall's eyebrows flew up her forehead - "then we slid down a slide and we were in another room - it was like a whole another part of the castle itself and it was huge and there was water everywhere. Then we were talking to Dan's ghost dad... okay, yes, this is weird but bear with me, we go to Wizarding school this isn't that bad. Anyway, we were talking to him then I had something of a panic attack and we left him but then this huge snake came and we saw it's reflection in the water but then it bit Dan on the leg and I tried to distract it then Dan climbed on top, sort of, and blinded it - which was disgusting, by the way, I almost threw up," he added to his boyfriend, who tried to chuckle but wound up coughing. "Anyway, it took me TWO killing curses to kill it! Oh damn, am I in trouble? It was hurting Dan! Surely that mustn't count." Phil was quite out of breath after all this rambling, and took a moment to compose himself.

McGonagall's eyes were wide and she seemed to be lost in thought after listening very intently to every word of Phil's rant, and it took a minute for her to respond.

"No...You're not in trouble, Mr. Lester. That was very courageous of you. Someone your age shouldn't have to use that curse at all, it must have been too weak the first time...You said, a 'big snake?' It can't be..." She murmured to herself more than anyone. "What color were it's eyes?"

"Yellow."

"I'm afraid you've just been attacked by a basilisk."

"Like the one Harry Potter killed?" Phil asked happily.

"That's the problem, Mr. Lester," stated McGonagall, her face wrinkling as she paced around the large room. "Harry Potter and company were supposed to have killed the basilisk twelve years ago, in their second year. The room you were in is a Hogwarts myth - proven real, I suppose - called the Chamber of Secrets. Salazar Slytherin placed the basilisk there when Hogwarts was just being founded. Only a Parselmouth can control a basilisk...See, what's odd about your situation is...Boys, you're both supposed to be dead."

Phil gasped and Dan laughed.

"Thanks, Professor, I think I'll get to that."

The headmistress' lips were thinning dangerously and she narrowed her eyes, but said nothing of the matter. Dan made a mental note to not cross this woman. If looks could kill...I'd definitely be dead then.

"Basilisk venom is extremely venomous. And by the depth of your bite marks, you should have died the second the poison and your blood mixed. But," she gestured to the blood stains leading into her office, "this is obviously not the case. And Philip, you said that you looked into it's eyes?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"The Basilisk has a murderous stare, and all who are fixed with the beam of its eye shall suffer instant death."

Dan and Phil glanced at each other, wondering why in the world they were still alive.

McGonagall took a deep breath.