Finding My Soulmate

Chapter 29

Hazel

It was finally Friday. Thank goodness! A few texts and a couple short phone calls just wasn't enough. Harry should be back tonight around seven thirty. Three more hours!

Liam and Louis came back a couple hours ago and they were just lying around the living room scanning the tv channels, mumbling now and then about how nothing good was on. Niall and Sidney went out to a movie and was going to pick up dinner on their way home, since they will be home around the time Harry gets back.

I was so anxious, not just to see Harry tonight but for the fact in just a couple days I'll be off with Harry and the guys for a week for their tour. I'll be leaving my little girl for a week. The longest I've ever left her was just overnight here and there at my parents. I imagine leaving her will be just as hard, if not harder, than it was when Harry left.

I was excited though. I'm going to be traveling, going to see different places, try new things, experience new things. I'm nervous for all of it but I'm also extremely excited. I mean, who wouldn't be thrilled at the chance to travel with One Direction? Just thinking back to when I first met Harry, if someone told me that, weeks from then, I'd be dating him and going off on tour with him, I'd laugh in their face and call them ridiculous. Stuff like that just doesn't happen to people like me.

Then, of course, my stupid brain starts to get panicky and starts thinking about what would happen if things didn't work out in the end. Let's say Harry realizes that dating a fan isn't worth his time and that he needs to be with someone who is more in his 'world,' where would that leave me? Heartbroken and a complete mess. Chloe would be sad too, she has grown so close with Harry, and even the rest of the guys too. They all have become like family in the short time we have spent with them. Our lives changed dramatically when they became apart of it, not sure how it will be if they all of a sudden weren't anymore.

I honestly don't know if I'll ever be able to love someone again if things between Harry and I don't work out. I'm not saying I don't have faith in us it's just that I can't help but have that small ounce of doubt after being with Derek, someone I thought I loved, who I thought loved me, for so long and then have him just up and leave. It broke my heart and made me build a wall, a wall that Harry so easily broke down, I just can't help but worry that maybe I let him tear it down to quick, that I should have waited longer and got to know him and his life better before decided to fall head over heals for him and go off to explore the world with him.

Who am I kidding, I think falling for Harry was inevitable.

Still makes me a little scared. Or worried. I can't deal with that kind of pain again.

"Hey Hazel?" Louis says, breaking me out of my trance. Chloe was napping so I was just curled up in the recliner, staring aimlessly at the tv.

"Yeah?" I answer, voice scratchy, looking over at the boys on the couch.

"Are you ok?" He looks concerned.

I clear my throat before answering, "yeah, I'm fine, why?"

"You're crying. I know Gordon Ramsay can be an âss, but I don't think he's anything to cry over..." He jokes, which makes me laugh. I wipe at under my eyes, no even realizing I was crying. Why the heck am I crying?

"I didn't even realize I was crying, im sorry. I'm fine. Really." I assure him. He doesn't look like he believes me.

"Is it about Harry? Has the little shît done something?" He asks, sitting up and facing me more.

"No, Harry hasn't done anything, he is great. More than great," I tell him, smiling.

"Are you worried about going on tour with us? Or leaving Chloe for a week?"