Riot Princess

Chapter 8

This chapter is really sad again sorry

"No! No! Let him go!" I screamed violently as two paramedics picked up Gerard's limp body. "I said fucking let him GO!" I thrashed around and elbowed two of the paramedics trying to hold me back. The floor was covered in Gerard's blood, puddling around the stall I found him in. There was blood handprints on the walls from me trying to help him. I was drenched in blood, it had looked like I had killed him myself. I basically had, hadn't I? Pushing him away like that. Treating him like dirt. I was pushing away my feelings the only way I had known, hurting others. That's just what I do. Nobody gets close to me, nobody talks to me, because I'm an asshole who ruins people's lives.

The paramedics dragged my screaming body out of the washroom where a swarm of terrified students stood. All gasping or crying, confused. Everybody loved Gerard here. The school was very accepting and kind, unlike his old school. Everyone watched me as I screamed. My cries were the only noise, the room was silent. Tears stained my face and I felt like I was going to vomit from my chest heaving so much. I had a headache from screaming for Gerard, calling out to him in hopes that he would wake up and kiss me and everything would be alright. But it's not okay and it's not alright.

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I hadn't slept in a week. I haven't eaten in three days. I haven't gone to school in a week. I haven't left Gerard's hospital room in a week. He's in a coma. He's gonna make it. He's got scars on his arms that will never fade and it's my fault. Sometimes I sing to him. I refuse to sit in the hospital chairs, I lay in Gerard's bed with him, trying to warm up his cold body. The doctors tried to pry me away from him but they stopped trying on the third day. Now I sit with him in silence waiting for him to wake up. They tell me that he can hear me but I don't think he wants to hear me. At night I cuddle him until I fall asleep, which hasn't been happening lately , just in case he wakes up. He's going to wake up.

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It's been two weeks. I feel like garbage. I slept last night for the first time since he's been in here. His finger held mine last night. The doctors told me that I was hallucinating but Gerard had curled his finger around mine. I've been talking to him a lot now. Gerard may have accidentally tried to kill himself, but I'm the only one who died. I can't breathe when I'm away from him, scared that he's going to wake up and be afraid.

I stood up from his bed, thirsty. "I'm just going to get a drink, Gee." I told him, knowing he couldn't respond.

"Okay." A voice rasped out. My head spun around, eyes wide. There lay that son of a bitch, fucking grinning at me like he had just won the lottery. I broke down into tears and ran over to him, jumping on him. "Woah, woah careful Frankie." Gerard chuckled, wrapping his arms around my shaking body.

"You fucking asshole." I sobbed out, holding onto him for dear life. He's never fucking leaving me again.

"I'm so sorry." He choked out, sounding like he was on the verge of tears.

"No, I'm sorry. I did this to you." I dug my head in his neck, taking in the familiar scent of Gerard. "I'm s-so sorry."

"It's okay Frankie. You were only trying to protect yourself."

"Stop being nice to me it makes me want to hate you."

"Would you prefer if I was an asshole?" Gerard asked, tilting his head a little.

"Well," and suddenly I was shoved off the bed and on to the floor with a shocked look on my face. Gerard began laughing and sputtering out. "I didn't mean it like that!" I exclaimed, beginning to laugh as well. I slid on to the bed again with him, wrapping my arms around him.

"Shouldn't you get a doctor?" Gerard asked. I simply shook my head.

"Mm, no. I just want to be with you right now." I snuggled closer to him. Gerard nodded and snuggled closer to me like I had done to him. We finally fell asleep, cuddled next to each other. This is where we needed to be.