Off-limits

Chapter 16

It happened again. Just like it did every time I was put into a situation like this. I get shoved into changing rooms arms filled with clothes I feel uncomfortable wearing, and am forced to look into the long full body mirrors on the walls. Whenever I see my bare skin in the lighting of the store, the scarred, torn, hideous skin, I grow nauseous.

I always try desperately to look away, to pay no mind to the broken girl staring back at me, but it never works. It's like I can't help but look to see what has happened to me over the years. I once had smooth pale skin, soft and clear of my hideous scars, but it's been so long that I can't even picture it anymore. Tyler had been using me as a violence dummy for years, and I had even done a number on my self numerous times.

I trailed my fingers over a few of the deepest scars, feeling the indents they left on the slightly paler skin.

"Kay!! Are you almost done in there? I'm dying of hunger lets go!" Lucas' loud voice boomed throughout the changing area as I quickly scrambled to find my original top.

"Jeez I'm done, where do you want to get lunch?" I questioned whilst opening the door and walking out of the small room.

"Let's hit Taco Bell and head back to your place, I really wanna have a movie night." I couldn't help but inwardly groan at the thought, Lucas was a horror movie buff through and through, they are the only type of movie he ever wants to watch whenever we watch one.

I on the other hand absolutely f*cking hate horror movies. What's so fun about getting so scared you almost pee your pants? It just isn't logical.

"Lucas look I don't think that's a good idea..." I trailed hoping he would get the hint that I'm not in the mood for his gory cliche movies tonight.

"Kayla come on! There's a movie that I haven't been able to see yet that I really want to, and it just came out on On Demand. And we both know that your house has the better TV."

"Lucas I mean it I really don't feel like watching any movies tonight."
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I was going to stand my ground. Truly. Until he gave me his damn puppy dog eyes and I caved faster than you can say manipulate.

Before I could even understand  what was happening I was sitting on my couch with popcorn on my lap and a movie playing in front of me. The Movie playing was called The Forest and I was absolutely horrified. 

It was just me and Lucas at the house, when we had first gotten home I found a note written by Justin telling me that he had gone off to work on call to handle a couple things before the week begins and that he wouldn't be home till late. He had left money on the table to order dinner and reminded me to leave him some food in the fridge.

He also said that Ryan may swing by later on to check up on me even though he has a couple of family things going on tonight.

The small statement had gotten me thinking. Through all of the years I had known Ryan, I had never met any member of his family. Hell I've never even heard a word about them except for the fact that he commonly is busy with family business.

'I hope his family life is okay' I quietly thought to myself as I noticed a particularly graphic scene flashing across the screen in front of me.

I immediately launched up for the couch onto my feet and told Lucas that I needed from fresh air before grabbing my purse and throwing some shoes in my feet.

I stepped out onto the main walkway, sitting down on the top step before pulling out my lighter and a pack of cancer sticks.

I lit up and breathed deeply trying desperately to calm my racing mind. I couldn't help but think of everything.