The Garage Band》A.I.《

Chapter 13

*Ashton's Note*

Lylla,

It's been so long since someone has made me wake up in the morning with a smile on my face.

The darkness that consumes me inside, was so hard to control before. The smile I wore was fake, drawn from my best acting skills.

You and the boys have asked me about my past. I'm sorry I was never ready to tell you, the truth is I wasn't ready to face it myself.

My mum was never really around alot. Busy with work, that's not her fault. We needed some way to get dinner on the table after dad left. She's a New Director, my mum that is. Another thing I haven't told you I guess. I have done that since we moved. A new start, my mum called it when she told me we were moving. I told her not to tell you guys about my past, about how messed up I am inside. She agreed, it was best until I was ready. And I am ready now, I think you need to know.

I put my keys on the entry-hall table, and checked the microwave for my cold dinner. Every night I go through these useless routines I've made, since mum decided to go back to work full-time again after dad left. She heals her pain of dad's cheating by working long hours constantly. But I don't have that luxury.

My mate Aaron, was throwing a party. When staring around at my empty house, this seems like a better option than being alone. I'm sick of being alone. For once I want to be a teenager, not a pre-mature adult.

I grab my keys and drive to Aaron's house. Someone directs me to the kitchen full of drinks. I grab one and head to the lounge, everyone is dancing and having fun. I wanted this, I needed this to let go, forget my problems.

After one drink, my issues were still drilled into my brain. I forgot nothing, I wasn't half as happy as every one else. I have another drink, it helps slightly, minisculely. I have another, "there now I'm looseining up a bit", I think. Everytime I down another one I forget further, and further. "I like this," I think, "I need more..." "Until there are no problems left, until I can't feel it anymore."

I don't even remember it from there. I woke up in a hospital bed. Apparently I was lucky to survive, I didn't see it that way. When I woke up the pain had come back.

Mum told me what happened, I poisoned myself.

The only thing I thought, was making it better, almost killed me. I fainted in the middle of the lounge, luckilly someone was sober enough to call an ambulance. The paramedics got there just in time, though at that point I would have been happy either way. I'd had enough of my problems dragging me down.

I told mum this, and she blamed herself. How she was never around to see me sprialling. To be honest, I couldn't even see myself sprialling, so doubt she would've if she was around.

I got better, the anti-depressants they helped. Mum quit her job and gave me an armband I always wear. It says, "stay strong", she gave it to me the day i got off the drugs and I havent take it off since. That was three months ago.

When I was well enough, mum said we can move if I want to. I did. I'd healed the physical scars but I needed someplace new, and fresh, to heal the ones in my head.

I'm sorry if this is alot to take in, but you need to know so we can grow together. Because I want to. I need to. I need you.

If this is too much I understand, but I'm glad I told you. Because you're forever my tomorrow.

I love you Lylla,

Your Asha.

(A/N This is fiction and in no way describes actual events.)