Snow

Chapter Thirteen

The moment Andy and I had made up, it seemed like everything else had just fallen into place. I started to put the weight back on quickly - my skin, hair and overall body looked overall healthier. There was no longer any whispering on the bus and everyone seemed to be feeling normal around me once again. It felt like things were going back to normal, a good normal, and I couldn't have been happier.

In the weeks that followed Andy's performance, I'd felt lighter than I had done in months. There was no longer a weight on my shoulders and I was finally able to let myself grieve for Tommy in a healthy way. I still cried sometimes when I remembered a day we'd spent together, or a joke we'd shared, but it was the kind of crying that said 'I'll always remember you' rather than 'my heart is ripping into fucking shreds at the thought of you'. It was the kind of crying that I was okay with, and I was glad that the heart-wrenching and bone-shattering sobs were behind me.

We'd been back home for three months, and I was sat in Andy's lap whilst we watched Peanut and Crow chase each other on the floor. The TV was on and we were surrounded by both our bands, as well as some people who'd come over from England.

Laura had come down for a visit, and she'd invited my brothers with her. Derk and Liam had come along, bringing messages from my parents and the people they'd left behind. I'd made up with dad only a week before their visit, and he'd apologized for being such a bitch. I hadn't wanted to make a big deal out of it when things were going so well, so I just told him to 'stop with the PMS already' and we'd laughed the whole thing off.

Laura was doing pretty damn well since I'd last seen her. She'd put on a lot of weight and now stood at an almost-healthy seven stones and two pounds. She still struggled some days, but those were the days when she'd call me and we'd just talk for hours. She looked a lot healthier now that she'd put some weight on - her hair was shiny and fell in soft waves rather than being dry and dull-looking; her nails were no longer so weak and breakable - she'd actually painted them for once - and her smile was wide and real. She laughed like there was no tomorrow, and but I could tell that Tommy's death was still hurting her.

We hadn't really spoken about him much since we'd both started recovering. The memories would only throw the both of us off track, and that was the last thing either of us needed. Instead, we steered clear of difficult topics and just spoke about the first things we thought of. They were generally stupid and mundane, but I didn't mind at all. It felt good to just talk to her, and I was glad that the distance between us hadn't effected our relationship. It would've killed me to know that me moving away meant that we grew further apart in every way.

Andy and I were still going strong. We'd all but forgotten about our argument and the way we'd acted all those months ago, but there were still days when I could feel the worry that hung heavy in his gaze as it fell on me. I'd usually just ignore it and attempt to keep myself from noticing. It bothered me that he felt like he still had to walk on eggshells around me, but it just made it feel even more triumphant when I proved him wrong.

*

"Dude, get the hell off of me." I breathed, smacking the top of Ash's head and shoving him from my lap. I was lying on the couch with Andy sat underneath my head, and apparently Ashley had taken that as an invitation to sit on me. Laughing, he fell to the floor and got back onto his feet, tackling me and pulling me down with him. We rolled around on the floor for a bit, tickling each other and play-fighting, until I pinned him down and grinned, holding my hands up with a triumphant smile. Grinning, I got to my feet and put a foot on his back, kissing my biceps sarcastically. I could hear him grumbling from the floor and laughed, poking his side with my foot before returning to my seat.