Come Inside the Mind of Jack - Things That Annoy Me

Customers...

Well it seems that it's finally time to get to the source of my bitterness. I was once a happy and innocent child... then all of a sudden... I got a job. You wouldn't believe how much I have changed since I first started. My anger and resentment rose above safe levels. Here's why!

1****

Cocky bastards... There seems to be a ton of these guys around where I work. When I talk to them they always have their chin up. Are they looking into the heavens because they will never be there? I'm trying to look them in the eyes but all I see in front of me is a double chin... They also think they're so rich. You should see how proud they look when they buy something that's $9.95... They then pay with a $10 note while saying  "keep the change"... It's fine if they just say it but these bastards look so bloody arrogant and they expect me to get on my knees and be extremely thankful. I guess to them it feels like they're donating to charity. Thanks for the huge tip mate! You have made my day!... No, you have made my year with your 5 cents that I don't even get to keep.

2****

People who are too lazy to say stuff... Bloody hell these guys piss me off really badly. You wouldn't believe how many times I hear the words "the usual"... How the hell am I supposed to remember what you normally have? Is it that hard to say 2 extra lines? What's worse is when they say it after they have come only once beforehand. I hope they realise that I'm not a Cybernetic organism with 10 terabytes of memory! I can't remember every single customer's orders! I have a hard enough time remembering birthdays.

This reminds me of a time when a guy came in asking for some cigarettes. I just want to point out that there are heaps of cigarette brands... So I ask him which pack of cigarettes he was after... His reply was... "cigarettes"... Did he expect me to read his mind?! How the bloody hell am I supposed to know which ones he wanted? So I asked him again which brand he wanted. His only response was "cigarettes" . So I ask him again... At this point I guess he started to get annoyed because he started screaming "CIGARETTES! I WANT CIGARETTES!"... This exchange goes on for a few minutes until I start naming all the different brands... Which took forever. He then finds the brand he was looking for... Was all that really necessary? Did he expect the volume of his voice to jog my memory? At that point he asked me how much the cigarettes cost... So I tried to get him back for yelling at me... I said the cigarettes cost..."Money".

3****

Greeting customers... Hi, How are you? What is your response for that? "Good, great, not bad etc" That's the correct answer. Well I should give that lesson to some customers because whenever a customer walks into the store I have to greet them. Most people know the correct response but some bastards don't.... I'll say "Hey, how are you?".. Their response... "Yeah"... What the hell does "yeah" even mean? It's either I'm illiterate or it doesn't make any sense at all. I didn't realise that "yeah" was a feeling... Imagine that... Hey, how does it feel to have passed the test? It feels "yeah". How does it feel to become the president? "Yeah"... The world would be a disaster!

Thank you kindly for reading this far! Some customers do get on my nerves. But I'll have to deal with them. Sorry for making this chapter so short.

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If you don't like my stuff or you're one of those bastard customers then come find me and punch me in the face. I live in Sydney NSW somewhere.