Look At Me (Completed)

CHAPTER 27: It's better to be this way

MARK's POV

Guila left me and she said she doesn't love me anymore but I don't believe her. I can feel and I can see in her eyes how much she loves me but then I have to understand her because she also loves Cassie.

I followed Cassie to explain but she quickly got a cab and left me too. Why does everyone keep on leaving and pushing me away? I can't accept this so I drove to Guila's house. I trespassed at her gate and knocked on her door. She opened it and when she sees me, she was about to close the door but I stopped her. I forced myself to enter her house. "We need to talk Guila," I said.

"We don't need to talk. You need to go to Cassie. She needs you."

"I can't endure this pain anymore. I don't want to lie to myself and to her anymore. You are the one that I love and no matter how much you try to push me, I will keep coming back. I lo..."

"Stop it please," she cuts me.

"You stop..." I said and then pulled her to me and kiss her with so much longing in me. She tries to stop me but I held her tight not wanting to break the kiss. After a second, she gives in. I knew she loves me, she misses me and she needs me. We kiss with so much passion and love and all I could feel is, 'I don't want this to end'.

But after a minute, she holds back pushing me away saying out loud, "This is not right!"

"Guila, I am tired of pretending! I want to be real to myself, to you and to Cassie! If you love me, fight for me, fight with me," I begged holding her shoulders so tight.

"I can't. Please go back to her. Beg for her," she said as she controls the tears on her eyes.

"Why are you making things harder?" I asked as tears keep on flowing on my cheeks.

"Like what I've said awhile ago. I don't love you anymore. You know what you are the reason why these things happened! You just wrecked my life. Now, the media will bombard me ruining my reputation and dignity."

"So now this is my fault huh? As far as I know, you gave in too. Guila, stop saying that you don't love me because I can feel, you love me so much! And you're just saying all those words to make me leave. I tell you, I won't leave you."

"Well, f*ck you. When I say I don't love you, it's true," she said narrowing her eyes on me.

It hurts but I still don't believe her. I want her to prove it so I said, "You don't love me anymore huh? Then I'll leave and if you let me leave your door, you'll never see me again. Never forever. I am going to curse you for the rest of my life. Do you want that?"

"Then leave," she said coldly. This is f*cking hurting.

I just gave her a glare as I step backwards. I am obviously waiting for her to stop me.

"You really want this?" I asked not wanting to leave.

I can see the pain in her eyes. She looked away and said, "Just leave and don't forget to lock the door." She then turned away and walked upstairs. What the f*ck?

I am tired to understand her. Everything is revealed now. Why can't she just be real? I can't endure this pain anymore. I think I better leave and forget her. If she doesn't want me, then let it be. I am exhausted feeling this pain.

With the broken heart and broken soul, I left her house, I left her. I am going to live up my words. Maybe, it's time to move on.

GUILA's POV

Mark is not meant to be with me. He deserves better and Cassie is better than me. Even if hurting him pains me so much, I did it for the sake of doing what I think is right. I am coward I know but I admit, I am regretting. At the first place, I don't want to hurt him but I am thinking of the people surrounding us. Even if it hurts, it is still better to hear news flashing 'Cassie and Mark reconciled after all the cheating – he's still a good man' than 'Cassie's ruined! Boyfriend Mark chooses Guila Loveland! – two sh*ts cheaters.' I mean it will be worse. It's better to be this way even if it hurts so deep.

After two months...