Hard To Love (a Josh Hutcherson Fan Fiction)

Chapter 33

Song of the chapter: Be Alright by Justin Bieber

Stella's POV

Josh and I got home from New York two days ago and while I have never been happier in my life, I was hoping that the result on the test I took a few days prior was just a malfunction of the product, but everyday, more and more seems to be pieced together making it more of an actual reality. I'm nervous to go into the doctor, because I fear the confirmation they will give me that the little white stick was right, and soon we will hear the little pitter patter of feet prancing around on our hardwood floors, giggling as Driver plays and licks his brand new, baby skin.

I often glance down at the ring on my left hand and find myself trying to convince my mind that this is not a dream, and no pinching will be necessary to wake up. I have been so distracted by my happiness that I had almost forgotten I had even taken the test until I was throwing up uncontrollably at 4am and had to call in sick to work this morning.

I don't want to tell Josh. I know I should, and I shouldn't want to keep anything from him, but a little devil on my left shoulder keeps whispering, no Stella, you're happy, he's happy, don't tell him don't tell him it'll ruin everything. While the angel on my right shoulder sings, Tell him, Stella! He loves you, and if there is a baby, he will love it too! You have nothing to worry about!

The constant bickering of the cliche "angel and devil on my shoulder" bit is not aiding the constant headache I have from hacking out my insides while leaning over a toilet as the rest of the world sleeps, and I cannot wait for it to be over.

"Babe," Josh's voice rings softly through the bathroom door and he knocks softly, "You okay in there?" his voice is raspy, like he just woke up and heard me, then came trudging to the bathroom to check on me.

I look down at my knees all scrunched up under myself as I sit on the bathroom floor hovering the toilet, clutching my stomach underneath one of Josh'd old v-necks, "I'll be alright!" I just finish my sentence when another wave hits me and I hurl back into the toilet, and finally, the feeling of naseuousness has escaped from inside me, making me sigh with relief.

I stand up and wash my hands and brush my teeth, then comb my bird's nest, better known as my bed head, and then twist the doorknob slowly, making sure not to hit Josh with the door. As soon as I walk through the entryway, he wraps me in his arms.

"We should take you to a doctor once they open. Right now, you need some rest." He says as I bury my face into his shoulder.

"sorry for waking you up." I say softly.

"Don't you dare be sorry, baby. I don't mind." He kisses my forehead and leads me to the bed. "Sleep means nothing to me when you are sick, okay? Next time, please wake me up." He says to me as we face each other laying in the bed.

I trace my finger over his jaw and sigh, "you're too good to me, and I don't deserve it."

"Shh." He puts a finger over my lips, "I'm the one who doesn't deserve you. Now c'mere." He pulls me tightly into his arms and kisses my forehead, then hums me to sleep.

...

I am jolted awake by the loud pop of thunder that cracks outside my window. I sit up and grab my chest in an attempt to slow my fast paced heartbeat. I look over to my left and see that Josh is missing, with a note in his place.

Goodmorning baby. I hope you slept well. Had to go in early to go over some scripts with the director.. Call me if you need anything I can pick up on the way home. I hope you feel better, I love you. -J.

I smile at the note, but frown at the fact that he isn't here. I have some major things I need to talk to him about that I can only go so much longer before it all spills out like word vomit.