Thoughts

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Taylor was making food while waiting for Calvin to arrive. After their ultrasound he had dropped her off at their house and went to buy some things he needed for his studio. She couldn't believed how much their lives had changed after they met almost a year ago.

She was almost 19 weeks and every now rand then she could feel their baby move inside her. They had just found out the sex of the baby and they couldn't be more static about it.

The door of the house opened and Calvin appeared at the kitchen with his hands full of shopping bags. He placed them in the kitchen countertop and wrapped his arms around Taylor softly caressing her belly.

" I bought some stuff" he said casually as he watched Taylor finish their meal. She knew that he must have bought something exciting because he had a permanent smile in his lips and his eyes were shining.

" I see that! You don't like shopping very much... What did you get?" She asked curious.

Calvin went over to the shopping bags and took out a small onesie " I thought that this would look cute on her" he smiled as he showed her the pale pink and yellow onesie.

Taylor smiled so big and her eyes went full of happy tears. She had never seen him so excited about something.

" that's adorable babe!" She walked over to him and wrapped her arms around him " what else did you buy?"

He took out of the bag a little navy blue dress and held it up for Taylor to see " I know that it is for when she gets a little older, I think the size is 2-3 months but I couldn't resist... She will look so beautiful in this" he said beaming.

Taylor kissed his cheek and wrapped her arms even tighter around him " you are really excited about having a girl, aren't you? I thought that you would have preferred a boy"

Calvin kissed her head " I wouldn't have minded it if we were having a boy ... But having a mini you... Like she will be so adorable and I will be able to spoil her and cuddle her... She will be daddy's girl"

Taylor's hormones got the best of her and she couldn't help but cry. They were happy tears, she never expected him to be so excited about being a dad.

" I love you so much" she whispered against his chest " you are going to be such an amazing dad"

Calvin kissed her head and smiled " you are going to be the best mom ever" he whispered in her ear " do you want to see what else I bought?" He asked excited again.

Taylor nodded and turned off the stove before sitting down on the kitchen table. Calvin started to take pieces and pieces of clothing out of the bag " babe did you buy our baby girl clothing for her whole first year?"

Calvin smiled and nodded " have you entered a baby clothing store? They have all this extremely adorable outfits and imagine our kid, that is going to be extremely adorable, in this clothes!"

Taylor laughed and got up to kiss his cheek " you are the one being adorable" 

Calvin gave her a shy smile and kept pulling baby clothes out of the shopping bags. He finally pulled out a Victoria Secrets box and handed it to Taylor.

" I heard you complaining the other day... So I bought you these and also a little something with which we can have fun with" he said softly.

Taylor opened the box and found a few bras that were a size bigger than the ones that she currently had home. She had been planning on going to buy new ones but she didn't feel like buying underwear or lingerie when she didn't feel sexy at all. She wiped the tears that had escaped from her eyes.

"You are so thoughtful ... I was planning on going to buy new ones but I don't feel like going to buy underwear when I look huge"  she said while continuing to wipe her tears

She felt him wrap his arms around her and kiss her head " hey! You are not huge... You are beautiful... You have never looked more beautiful than now carrying our girl" he kept kissing her head " I also bought a couple of lingerie pieces... I thought that you would look incredibly sexy and beautiful in them... You don't have to wear them if you don't feel like it ... But I assure you that you have never looked more gorgeous than right now that you are pregnant with our child"

"You really think that? I still turn you on even though I am getting huge? Have you thought about how will I look after I have our baby girl? I won't have abs and I will probably have a huge butt and saggy breast and ... Oh my god ... We will never have sex again because why would you even want to have sex with someone that looks like that" Taylor started to ramble, letting her most recent fears out.

" Tay, love!! Look at me... Take a deep breath" he instructed her " first, I still get turned on by you... You have a really tiny and adorable belly... And even if you had this big baby bump... You are carrying out daughter, there is nothing sexier than that" he told her holding her gaze with his.

"But what about after?" She whispered.

" why didn't you tell me you were feeling like this? That you were getting yourself all worked up about how your body will look like after you give birth?" He asked softly

" because ... I don't know... It sounds so superficial when I say it at loud Adam... But I want my fiancé to be attracted to me... I want you to find me sexy... When you get turn on by me... I feel powerful... Like ... I don't know" she looked down and whispered " I don't want you to leave me because you are not attracted to me anymore. I know it sounds superficial and when I say it out loud, it is irrational because I know that what we have goes beyond being physically attracted to each other but... Some part of my brain cannot help but fear that "

Calvin lifted up her chin and held her gaze " you know what I find sexy about you? Your mind... Yes, you having this amazing body is a plus and I won't mind if you have stretch marks or if you have some more curves... What makes me attracted to you, what I love about you is in here" he said tapping her forehead " I won't look like this all my life... I don't want you to feel pressured to get back to your old body after you give birth to our daughter" he kissed her forehead " but baby... Please... Talk to me when you feel like this... Tell me what are you afraid of... It is the only way in which we can tackle the problems together"

Taylor buried her face on his chest " I love you Adam... Thank you"

Adam kissed her head " always baby... I love you"

AN: it is not proofread. Hope you enjoy

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⏰ Última actualización: Nov 16, 2015 ⏰

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