I'll Make This Feel Like Home (Kellic)

2

There wasn't much to do on a day-to-day basis. Your main priority was just to stay alive and sane, Which was something that wasn't as easy as It seems. Somedays you'd find something to distract you from the looming sadness; like sleep, food, or even drugs. And other days, you swear you're better off dead. Today was definitely one of those days where I'd rather get hit by a bus.

I think today was Friday and I was sitting in a long alley, staring at a bug try to climb the wall across from me. It kept trying to climb it, but it would fall on it's back every time. The stupid thing should know when to give up. It's just going to end up dying if it keeps trying.

"Kellin?" I suddenly hear my name echo through the alley. My head shoots up and I see someone standing a few feet away from me.

"Ah, it is you." He says before walking closer to me. Usually, I would stand up and run, or at least try to defend myself against this person, But I didn't have the energy, nor did I care. So I remained sitting as the person walked over to me and eventually sat beside me. Once they were there, I knew who they were.

"Jordan? I haven't seen you in weeks!" I exclamimed. Jordan was my, I guess you could say friend who I met my first week out here. He had been selling himself to, well, really anybody who had money. He was actually straight but if there was money involved, he would be gay on the quicks because money is money. And I had asked him if I could do it too, you know, for some sort of income, but he said it was too dangerous and he didn't want me to get caught up in something like that. He's a seriously kind guy, he just got dealt a bad set of cards, you know? But anyway, he still tries as best to survive, just like the rest of us, and will do as much as possible to help you out, if you're close enough to him.

"Yeah, I was staying at my cousin's for a while." He said before taking a sip from a water bottle that I hadn't even noticed he had in his hand.

"Alexa?" I asked to which he nodded. I remember I stayed the once, but it was pretty awful. She had like three other people staying there at the time, and they were all major junkies that did some pretty sketchy things that I wanted no part of.

"Want some?" He offered his water to me. I nodded viciously because I was thirsty as hell and he could probably tell my the way I eyed him when he drank it.

He handed the bottle to me and I drank the strange tasting water, savoring it's foreign taste like it was liquid gold.

"Chill, dude. It's spiked." He said before taking it away from me.

Shit, that's not what I wanted. I try not to do that kind of stuff. I mean, I've done some weird stuff before and drugs that I didn't even know the name of, but I hated it. It always made me feel 10x worse about myself and only made me want to die more. The problem was, Jordan was a big junkie, and even though he doesn't pressure me anymore, and respects that I don't want to do it, he still does it, and I'm still around it- which I hate.

"Why didn't you say that before I drank it?" I sighed.

"You looked stressed." He shrugged.

Stressed was an understatement. It has been 5 months and my parents still haven't bothered trying to look for me, But what did I expect? When they said they wanted me out of their house, they fucking meant it. I just wish had all been a dream, though. I wish I could fall asleep, wake up and be in the comfort of an actual bed, in my own room again. And I know I shouldn't think about these things, but how could I not?

It felt like I had only blinked but suddenly it was dark out, and Jordan and I had actually been sitting there for hours.

"Man, I have to go." He soddenly said, breaking our silent streak. I would have asked where he was going and when he'd be back, but I already knew. He was going to have sex with for a few bucks, then find somewhere else to crash. And I probably won't see him for another week. It's always the same. I nodded, although I don't think he saw, because the lights hadn't turned on yet in here. But he still proceeded to get up and leave.