Chim - Turn To Stone

Chapter 36

Thirty - Six

There was a time, not so long ago, when I went home for the weekend to see my family. Cheryl didn’t want to come with me in case it looked suspicious, so she stayed at home. When I got back she had bought me the biggest bunch of flowers I had ever seen. 

Looking back now, maybe it was a guilty conscience. Maybe she had been unfaithful to me every time my back was turned. The nature of our lives meant that we didn’t get to spend every spare moment together, sometimes there would be times when we wouldn’t get to see each other for days at a time, even though we lived in the same house. 

For me, just knowing that I would get to see Cheryl at some point was enough to get me through the lonely times, but what got Cheryl through? Or who got Cheryl through?

The thought sent a shiver down my spine. I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye as she concentrated on the roads, we should really have got somebody to drive us to the restaurant because once the paparazzi caught sight of us, Cheryl would no doubt try to out manoeuvre them. 

It was my idea though, I wanted to at least try and have a sense of normalcy about our relationship. It was so easy to lose sight these days, as I had learnt to my disadvantage. 

“you look amazing” she said with a soft smile, glancing at me for the briefest second before returning her gaze to the road. 

I don’t know what it was, but whenever Cheryl complemented me, it was as if I was the most important person in the world. Whatever I was thinking, or however angry I was with her just seemed to melt away when I heard her telling me I looked good. 

“well it’s all for you” I joked light heartedly even though it was true. Since I met Cheryl 7 years ago, not one person had ever turned my head. Not one person ever made me feel like I was attracted to them and not one person ever entered my head but her. 

It wasn’t the same for her. I didn’t mean as much to her as she did to me, and that was a fact I was just going to have to come to terms with. Not once, in the last 7 years had I wanted to sleep with anyone but her, and even before we got together, when ever I was with somebody, it was her I seen when I closed my eyes. 

It wasn’t the same for her.

-

We sat down at our table without much fuss. There was the usual stares as we walked to our table, but we had been here quite a few times and it was fairly private. Expensive enough to ensure that the paparazzi wouldn’t hound us all night, yet large enough so that we got lost in the crowd. 

We sat in a booth towards the back end of the restaurant which wasn’t overlooked by anybody. 

The waiter came over with the menu’s and handed us one each, doing a slight double take when he noticed Cheryl. “any drinks” he asked, still staring at her. 

“a bottle of house white” Cheryl replied without even having to ask me. Its what we always ordered together. 

I felt her foot brushing up against one of my legs as the waiter left the table. The candle on the table flickered gently, illuminating the seductive smile on her face. 

“somebody might see” I said to her quietly, moving my leg. She frowned before making a show of looking under the table. 

“nope…nobody under there” she said sarcastically before throwing me a look. I was thankful that the waiter had returned with the wine so that I didn’t have to explain why I didn’t want her touching me. 

The waiter took our orders quickly, staring at Cheryl for, what I thought, was slightly longer than necessary. He must have sensed the atmosphere in the air because he scurried away a lot quicker than he did the last time. 

“what’s wrong with you?” she whispered with a frown. “nothing” I replied, a little to quickly and defensively. I picked up my wine glass and poured us both a glass of wine each before taking a big gulp of mine. 

“you seem a bit tense” she went on, but made a conscious effort to keep her tone friendly, rather than hostile like it was a minute ago. 

“I’m just hungry” I lied, and gave her a smile in the hope it would convince her I was okay. It seemed to work because for the next half an hour she rambled on about a pair of shoes and a bag that she was going to buy. 

I listened, like I always did, to whatever it was she was saying. No matter if it was something trivial like shoes or important like work, I showed the same amount of interest in her conversations. 

Our food came soon afterwards and we both busied ourselves eating. “what would you do if I kissed you now” Cheryl asked suddenly, lifting her head from her bowl of pasta. 

“what do you mean” I asked her with a frown, putting my fork down. 

“would you kiss me back?” she asked me, her eyes filling with curiosity. 

I shrugged my shoulders, not knowing where she was going with the conversation. “or would you push me away like you did before” she added quietly. 

I knew she couldn’t let it go. If there was one flaw to Cheryl, it was her inability to let an argument pass her by. Normally I didn’t mind us having the odd argument, because I knew we’d have fun making up, but these days, it seemed we were always on the brink of a new argument. 

“I didn’t push you away, I just don’t think it’s a good idea to do that in public” I replied, a little sharply before taking another large swig of my wine. 

She nodded, as if she understood but I could tell by her face that she wasn’t willing to let it rest just yet. 

“I found the newspaper” she said, her tone accusatory. 

“am I not allowed to buy them anymore” I asked her sarcastically. Maybe on another day, in another place I might have done something to keep the peace, but I really wasn’t in the mood for it at the moment. 

“you didn’t have to buy that one” she said, anger, and what I thought might be guilt flashing through her eyes.

“why not, it was a surprisingly good read” I shot back. 

“Kimberley” she sighed, her tone couldn’t have been more hurt if I had slapped her across the face. 

I instantly felt guilty for being too harsh. I knew I should have just let it wash over me, it was the tabloids after all. But the seed of doubt had been planted, and even I couldn’t ignore it. 

“is it true?” I asked her, sounding weak. I didn’t want it to be true and she could hear it in my voice. I could see her cringe as her head registered my question. 

She laughed incredulously as she shot me a look that told me she wasn’t in the mood to be argued with. 

“you believe the papers over me” she said. Her voice told me she was hurt by it and her face told me I was being an idiot for even thinking it. 

“I’m not saying that, I just want to know if its true or not” I replied, trying my best to keep my voice low so as not to arouse any suspicion of the fellow diners. 

“I’m not even going to answer that Kimberley” she replied indignantly. 

“why not Cheryl. Something you don’t want to tell me?” I asked, keeping my voice low but my tone told her I wasn’t happy at all. 

“its all a load of b****cks Kimberley, he’s lying to make himself look big” she answered, not even bothering to keep her voice level any more. 

“but he isn’t lying about sleeping with you is he? So why would he lie about anything else?” it felt good to get everything off my chest. For ages I had kept my feelings to myself hoping that one day, they would just go away. 

She wanted to say something else but she didn’t. I could see her physically biting her lip from saying something that she would probably regret. 

I watched her get up, grab her bag and walk out of the restaurant, much to the amazed look of the other diners, and wondered why I didn’t want to follow her.