Teenage Dirtbag

12

I wanted it. I wanted it so badly, I brought her up on my desk and my hands grazed her hips.

"Harry," She whispered. This numb feeling fell over me, I couldn't stop it. She was a temptation I wish I could never know.

Her body was an island I could stay on for years. But I somehow couldn't bring myself to it. I wanted my lips to touch hers for so long, and when I finally get to the situation, I can't bring myself to go through with it.

"What you do to me Noel.." I whispered in her ear, gripping tighter on her hips.

My eyes trailed down to my hands that were pressed against her hips. I bit my lip, as she lifted her leg to wrap around my waist. I closed my eyes, feeling the other one join.

"Fuck.." I could feel my vision going blurry. I didn't understand why it was so frustrating and difficult for me.

She pulled me closer, running her hands down my back. She was trying to get a reaction out of me, It sure was working.

I was so close, our lips almost touching. I felt her breath, begging for my touch as she sighed. She was struggling as I was. I felt a little brave, moving slightly closer, waiting for her lips to finally touch.

I backed away, not realizing it.

"What's wrong?" She hops down, walking to me. Her hand meets with my cheek, while the other lays against my fast paced heart.

"I-I can't.." Her touch loosens, backing away.

"May I ask why?" She's doubting it. I can't have her doubting anything, or I won't be able to show her I feel.

"I just- I don't know, I can't figure out why!" My hands raked through my hair. I was being honest, I actually couldn't figure out why I can't go through with it.

"Hey, it's.. fine." She was close to me again. That feeling I got, uprising inside me. I groaned, walking to my bed and sitting down on the edge. She fiddled with her fingers as she neared me, crawling onto my lap.

I could feel the heat rise inside me. "Noel please.." How could someone so sweet and kind as her, act like this in front of someone like me? I couldn't find the words.

"Just- quiet." Her fingers were pressed against my lips, sighing as they dropped to her thighs.

She leaned in, getting ready to kiss me. I could feel the tremble in my hands as they gripped the bedsheets.

"I have to leave." She whispered, mere inches away from my lips. Noel got up, holding her hands to her stomach. "I'll.. walk you out." What the fuck was that?!

We walked downstairs in silence, seeing everyone watch us. I eyed everyone, telling them mentally to fuck off.

"Will you be at school tomorrow?" She turns and looks in my eyes, then at the bruises that are barely there.

"Yes, you?" She shrugged, giving me a small smile. "I guess." I smile back at her, grabbing her arm. She gasped, stepping towards me. "Thank you for coming." I whispered in her ear, bringing my hand down to hers.

"But I didn't-"

"Thank you." She blinked, her cheeks flushing as she opened the door and watching her walk out. I shut it behind her, leaning my forehead against it in humiliation.

I've had sex, made out with many girls, but I couldn't kiss Noel Jacobson. What the fuck is wrong with you Harry? Whatever phase this is, snap out of it!

I turned around the see my mum, dad, and sis all looking at me.

"What!" I yelled, looking at the three of them. "You two kissed, didn't you?" Gemma pressed her hand on her hip, giving me a devilish grin.

"N-No! It's none of your fucking buisness!" I walked into the kitchen, getting a glass for some water. She walked in, scaring me once I shut the fridge.

"Fuck Gemma stop doing that!"

"So you didn't kiss her?" She always loved to push people.

"No! Why do you care so fucking much?" She giggled, grabbing herself a gronola bar from the pantry. "That's sad Harry." I rolled my eyes, walking upstairs.

I stopped in front of my door, getting a text from someone. It was liam, saying he wanted me and the others to meet up at the bar. I turned, realizing my dad was still there.

"Dad!" I rushed down the stairs, finding him sitting on the couch next to my mum.

"Yes?"

"When you visited Zoey, what time of day was it?"

"During the day, why?" He was never gone during the day.

"Harry what are you trying to do?" My mum said, sitting up to face me. I could feel the sting from the tears build up in my eyes. Why would he lie after trying to prove he wasn't?

"Why.." The only thing I asked.

"Harry, what are you talking about?" He got up, standing next to my mum. I walked towards him, anger building up inside of me.

"Why would you- how could you!" My mum was getting worried, looking between the two of us.

"After the minutes you spent, proving yourself that you weren't a liar! After all the months we spent, waiting for you to return, just to find out that you lied?!" My mum gasped. I knew she'd be shocked, buy the glass breaking in the background I did not expect.

"You were never gone in the mornings. It was always night because that's when you went to Frank's house and smoked and drank and fucked all these women! You don't get to lie this time dad! I caught you and you can't say anything about it!" He blinked, watching me as I jabbed a finger in his chest while yelling at him.

"You lied and thought you could get away with it? You thought that you could forget those girls you fucked every night you were high. Every night that you were wasted but you couldn't tell the difference because everyday was different! Everyday you did one or the other, smoked weed, drank straight up whiskey, scotch, but it didn't matter to you! Oh, cause you were having fun!"

His chest was rising and falling fast, I'd gotten him riled up.

"Those women you fucked every night? Were they escorts? Slutty skanks you found off the street?"

"Harry?!" My mum yelled, getting in between us. I didn't like the way the words rolled off my tongue, but what else was I supposed to do to get the truth.

"Or was it Zoey? You'd been sleeping with her all this time because you felt bad for her." He didn't answer.

"Is that true?" His glare at my mum made everything clear.

"He doesn't need to say anything else mum." She covers her face, running out of the room.

"I can't believe you fucking thought that you could get away with this? You thought I was that stupid, didn't you?"

"Har-"

"Didn't you?!"

"No!! I only slept with her because she asked me too! Her husband wouldn't love her the way I did and she needed it to fulfill her life!!" I stepped back.

"Your fucking sick."

"Harry just listen to me!"

"I already have!! I'm not listening anymore, I'm tired of it! I'm tired of all the fucking lies that comes with your ass and I want you out of my life!! I mean it! Get out!!"

He stumbles back as I point a finger behind me towards the door. He circles around me, rushing out of the house. He looks back one last time.

"Don't you ever think about coming back!"

Then he was gone.

I ran upstairs locking my door and grabbing my phone.

"Liam."

"Harry, you okay?" I sighed, looking out my window.

"You lads still at the bar?"