double reflection (#Wattys2016)

ditch

EDITED 1.23.16

The next day, I was reckless more than usual. One, I ditched school. Two, I didn't tell the girls about my ditch day. Three, I had pancakes for lunch. Three sins that would ought to get me an earful and another beating from Darlene. It wasn't that she was abusive, no, she was just like that. It happens every so often, and besides being in the group is already mentally abusive. And that was that.

After the little moment yesterday with Luc, I didn't have the strength to face people fully. In honest, I enjoyed the hug I shared with him, it was nice. A bit unexpected but, nice. And that is saying a lot because when I used to be one of the jock's girlfriend, his touch always made me want to stab him with a fork. Multiple times.

I sighed, as I placed another sweet bite into my mouth, almost moaning at the taste. It was the second time in my whole life, that I was able to get this beautiful piece of food group, usually I was accustomed to basically air, water and gum. Quite satisfactory, no?

On second thought, it was far from satisfactory, more like the extreme starving project. I wouldn't call that a dream come true.

I snorted at my thoughts, as I inhaled the rest of the pancake in silence, often letting my mind drift to the unknown. After, I was able to smile a bit, realizing that the girls were not on my trail yet, like I hoped they would be. I felt a little free, but not for long.

I have no idea what or how to explain, but something told me I would be under the normal pressure of society and their inquisition any moment now. I dragged myself to the couch, barely glancing at the letter written on the table. As usual it was from Mom, explaining she had to work late and woke up this morning to get some overwork hours for our rent this month.

Honestly, I feel guilty already that I couldn't help her as much in the position of bills and finance, but I would feel even guiltier to see her writing tell me about her hard efforts to keep us supported. I frowned, feeling my forehead crease in concern and played with my fingers, thinking how the future would look. Where will we be. And who will be with us.

And then something, so simple as a knock startled me, which ultimately led me to the floor. I scrambled up and ran for the door, peeking through the hole. And there I was sure, the person I thought to avoid, standing in the glorious wind. Lucien.

I opened the door and acknowledged him with a small smile and I think I nodded.

"Hey, Ree. I didn't see you in class, so I stalked your address from the front desk and," he paused, "that sounded much better in my head." I gave him a smile, forced no doubt and didn't question his nickname. At least it wasn't the detested Rose one.

"Well, would you like to stalk your way in?"  I ask him, and he shook his head, walking inside nethertheless.

"Very funny," he said, placing his jacket on the hanger.

I pretended to muse at the comment, "I thought so."

And he laughed again, "And that's why I like you." My heart beated, a little too fast for my liking. I pressed my hand to my heart, and simply frowned.

"You don't have to do that, you know," I tell him, leading us both to the living room.

He eyed me, "Do what?"

I wave my hand, "The whole I like you, we like each other thing when its just us two."

He looked a bit shocked at first but then it turned more serious, "I am not pretending. I actually do like you. You are a good person like I said yesterday and all you need is someone to care."

I blinked at him, and sat on the couch, "So why are you here?"

He gave me a blank look, "That's it? Your going to ignore my confession and talk about why I'm here instead?!"

I looked him straight on, "I am, because unlike what you said, I am not a good person. I am bad, tainted, corrupted and blah blah blah. I am no saint or angel, hell I am worst then a demon. So I suggest you take that warning I gave you about me being danger. Because I am."

His face was a bit priceless then it proceed into a slow smile. "I said your a good person despite all the bad you see. Someone can be so messed up inside and treat everybody badly, but inside, the real you is good. And nothing like stupid rumors or your façade appearance can change that. You stay who you are internally, and so Ree, your gonna have to face the fact. That your a good. Person."

I glared at Lucien and seethed out, "Your here because?"

Lucien simply shrugged, ignoring my annoyed state, "I told you. I came by to check on you. Is that such a crime?"

I nodded, "Yea it is, especially when your teacher finds out you ditched. And when my friends see you came here to comfort me, and not to use me as a scoreboard."

He only shrugged, as if that decidedly made all the problems disappear and vanish with the simple gesture. "Well now that were done with the warm greetings, shall we mention yesterday?"

My brain panicked, my body froze and my face shocked into a pale white. "Uh, um I got home safely."

He nodded thoughtfully, "I mean before that."

I itched my head, "I ran to my house?"

He gestured, indicating he meant before that.

Dammit.

"You hugged me," I wanted to ask but then stated it firmly. I blinked, I was in trouble now.

Lucien smiled, a slow grin, making him look boyish, "But I'm more referring to what happened after. You hugged back." And so in the delusion of my non functional brain at the moment, I shrugged and send him a nervous grin.

"So?" I say, my voice a whisper.

"Its a sign," he tells me, taking my hand. I felt my heart vibrate in emotion and all that rainbow stuff. "It's about time we went on another date."

I swear time passed and I finally managed to sputter a "What?!"

He nodded, his eyes glowing in excitement or amusement or maybe both. "You heard me, our next date."

I took my hand away, and he frowned. "Listen, Luc. There's one thing that the boyfriends I get, don't do. And that is more than one date. A single date is to make it official and everything from that point, is drama then breakup then the next one."

"Well consider me in a different kind of boyfriend list, because Ree, we are going on this date. And there is nothing you and I, or anybody for that matter can do about it. " He gave me a smile, and took my hand again. I let him, because, well, I have no clue anymore.

"But-" I try to protest but he placed his other hand on my mouth.

"And I forgot to mention it begins now," he says without a hint of sarcasm. I was about to argue again when he pulled me from the couch and dragged me outside. And did mention that he dragged me out with only a shirt, pants and sneakers. The way Rosemarie dressed and not Rose.

And I couldn't help but let a small grin slip on my face because for once I was going out with a boy as Rosemarie and the boy didn't seem to mind.

(Sorry, so late. Grrr....but enjoy anyway.-A)