Hershey Kisses

Fourteenth Kiss

He stared at me for awhile and suddenly burst out laughing as if I was joking around. He continued laughing so hard as I stared at him upset. As he slowly stopped laughing and took a breath, he wiped a tear from his eye after laughing so long.

"I'm sorry." he tried to stop laughing, "What you just said is clearly not gonna fade away eight years worth of my feelings."

"That doesn't mean it's possible, Rick." I pouted at him determined. He scoffed and gave me a serious look. I didn't look away but kept locking my sight at him. "I never meant I want you to fall in love with me. Let me rephrase what I meant to say. Both of us have our first crush literally crushed because they have someone else in their mind. Yes even I felt I had a slight chance of hope I'd go back to him, but somewhere inside of me felt it's best to let go." I took a deep breath to word out my explaination as he continues listening to me silently. "This whole time when I thought no one understood me how I felt all these years it was selfish of me. But ever since I met you and dug into your life, I thought maybe he'd understand my feelings. And here we are now, I chose to ignore the feeling of falling in love when what I needed the most...." I hesitated my answer but suddenly a rubber ball hit the back of my head ending up biting my tongue which hurt like h-e double hockey stick. I turned to see who hit me and couldn't believe who it was.

"I was trying to aim that other guy but I guess I missed." Rufus said with a cocky accent. "This is what you've been doing without letting mom and dad know?" I looked down ashamed of him finding me skipping school and being a bad model for him.

"It's not what it looks like..." I tried to clarify.

"Save it." he looked away, "I made so many excuses to them of how you've been staying after school for college and stuff and this is what I see? You with some other guy and playing hooky and probably making out. What the hell, ate!!"

"If you just let me explain why I had to skip school..." as I continued trying to speak, Rick gripped my hand signaling me not to say anymore.

"Maybe you shouldn't come home." Rufus looked down. "I don't even know you anymore. Mom and dad... they're starting to not see you as their daughter any longer. Maybe you should just stay with your new boyfriend from now on. I'm sick of hiding more lies from them just for you." I stood up trying to hold his hand, but pushed and stepped away from me. "Do you even see yourself, ate? I get it, your heart got broken. Boo-hoo. But that doesn't mean you should let your brokenhearted self turn into a selfish human. Be glad you're old enough to move out of the house because I don't want to see your face anymore." He dashed away as I stood anguished and frozen.

"My parents.... disowned me?" I asked myself trying not to think it harder. My knees felt weak and I stumbled on the ground not knowing how to feel about this. "My brother did so much to hide what I was really doing and knew what my parents were talking behind my back. And now I lost his trust... all because I was heartbroken....." I burst out crying not because of love but because I let that feeling take over my body. My guilt of never giving up this feeling has led me to having no family to go to. I lost my first love and now my family. I can't understand what's so great about falling in love!!!

"WHY!!!!" I wailed hiding my ugly crying face, "Am I really that pathetic for being blinded by love?!" As I continuously bawled out my grief of letting my emotions take over my body, I felt someone placing their hand on my shoulder.

"Sophia...." Rick spoke softly.

"Rick...." I interrupted him, "Please help me get rid of this poison." I sighed deeply having no will to continue falling in love. "I'm tired of this. I'm tired of letting love ruin my relationship with everyone around me." I then felt a pat on my head.

"Then we'll move onto the next phase." he said. He pulled me up and walked on ahead. "I'll get a taxi so we can continue training back at my house." He continues staring at me as I continued staying motionless and exhausted. "It's my fault you got into a bad situation with your friends and family."

"It doesn't matter anymore..." I said. We stayed quiet until the taxi came to pick us up. As we drove from the playground to his house, we didn't spoke to each other. I'm so tired of this. I've had enough of getting broken from my best friend, my parents, and now my brother. As the taxi slowly parked in front of the house, I waited for Rick to pay the fare and we head inside. He took out a handkerchief and wiped my cheeks off guard.

"You think this is tiring..." he reasoned with me, "Try being in my shoes a little longer. Maybe you'll understand why you can never clear those eight years worth of feelings trapped in my heart."

"You didn't hear the rest what I had to say..." I spoke quietly. "What I needed the most wasn't falling for you... it was.... wanting my best friend." He stared at me startled didn't know what else he can say from my request.

"This whole time.... when I lost my friendship to my only friend..." I confessed, "I was already feeling lonely being trapped in a dark corner. Sure I have Chris and Penny but they've been friends for a long time. And ever since meeting you... I thought for sure.... I can surpass those feelings of not falling in love... but to overwrite my memories with my only best friend. Was that selfish of me? Asking you who I've only met to evaporate those memories of shame and guilt?" He pulled me in close to his chest and rubbed my back comforting my needs.

"Sophia..." he whispered, "Once this is all over, you can live with me. I'll take full responsibility and help you out in any way I can. I promise we'll find Juliet soon and you can go back to your normal life, Sophia."

I don't know if I should feel relieved he'll help me... or I'm asking way too much from him. He's done alot for me and all I've done is stumble upon his dark life and agreed to find Juliet. How can I continue asking for his help for my selfishness and my needs. I don't know if I want to stay by him after all this catastrophe or run away from all the mess I've done.

I don't know anymore...