Winters POV
WOW! It's beautiful. It's so romantic. I love it.
"You like it?" Kellin asks
"Ya" I say still amazed
"I'm glad you like it", Kellin says smiling. He looked good today. He was smiling and talking about how much he liked it. It was great time. He made me happier than I have been in a long time.
"Kellin, I like you. I don't really know what it feels like but I think that's what I feel." I say nervously biting on my lip.
"I don't know what it feels like either, but we can be here for each other to help sort out these feelings", Kellin says sincerely.
"Ya." I say with a smile
"Will you be my girl friend?" he throws me off guard with the question
"I don't know. I think I would, but I'm leaving here soon. I really like you. I do. I just don't think I'm good enough for you any way. " I say mumbling the last part.
"You are perfect. I don't want to hear things like that ever come out of your mouth." he says sharply making me flinch a little
"I'm broken and you're not. I'm me and you are you. We don't go. You need to find someone who is not broken and I need someone who is I don't know maybe no one. But a positive and a negative make a negative and that's not what I want", I say a tear slipping out of my eye.
"First your analogy is stupid and just because I don't show me being broken doesn't mean I'm not. I'm forced to hide behind a smile everyday. That's why I am the way I am. That's why I was the first to notice you were missing the other night. I know what it's like to just want it all to be over and I just had a feeling you had something going on. That's why I was there." He says
"How? How do you know what it is like? After their deaths for a little bit I just wished I would have been killed instead. I still wish that sometimes. I tried to commit suicide three times. You don't understand and if you do I wish you didn't. No one deserves to know what this feels like."
"I'm 17 years old. When I was 15 Jack found me in the boys bathroom with a gun to my head. I was institutionalised. I got out and I tried again and my mom found me that's when she kicked me out. She said I was a physo and I didn't belong to her. I was so bad after that. I moved in with Jack and he got me help and now I'm on meds for Bipolar Depression."
By the end of his story I was crying. I wrapped my arms around him. Letting us cry into each other's shoulders. It wasn't a bad silence that was happening. I pulled away from the embrace and I looked into his red eyes and couldn't help but ask. "Why?", I covered my mouth shocked that'd I'd say something so rude
"It's okay. It's long is that okay?", He says acting a little nervous to tell apart of him he is obviously not comfortable with talking about.
"My mom had me when she was 13. She wasn't ready for me and she was forced by her mom to keep me because she didn't believe in abortion. She also couldn't give me up for adoption because she didn't want me to be able to be found by the man that did what he did to her. So, she gave birth to me and I was a mess up. Everytime my mom looked at me she thought of that horrid man. She hated me. She told me when I was 6 that when she gave birth to me she didn't feel the love you're supposed to feel when you have a part of you in the form of a child. She told me that I looked to much like him for her to ever love me. I went through life carrying that burden with me. Finally at the age of 15 she had said her last hateful thing to me which were exact words 'I hate you. I wish you would die. You are a psycho just like your father. I wish that you'd just actually go die. You're the reason I had to grow up so fast I hate you. Now go to school.' That was it. I ditched my first class and got a gun and I tried to die like she wanted. Jack came in and took my gun and I was sobbing and I fall to the ground. Jack yelled for someone to call an ambulance. I was screaming 'I want to die' over and over again. When the ambulance got here and saw my condition they told Jack that they were taking me to the mental hospital. Jack tried to reason with them but they sent me there anyway. After 6 months I got out. It was treble. When I got out Jack wasn't there for me he had to leave a few months to Colorado for his music. So, I was Physo at my school. My mom just kept telling me that I'm a Physo and she wanted me to die so I tried it. So, I tried it again and when my mom caught me she packed up my clothes and kicked me out. So, I left and went to Colorado" Kellin says.
"No one deserves that." I say
YOU ARE READING
Forever Us
Fiksi Remaja"Even wide awake or dreaming I'm the one who ends up leaving Make it ok See a war I want to fight it See a match I want to strike it Every fire I've ignited Faded to gray But now that I'm broke Now that you you know it Caught up in a moment Can...
