This Is A Song For The Forgotten.

Words Sincere That I Hold Dear

I was just sitting in my chair doodling while Danene helped organize the pamphlets and instruments. The bell rang at the front and I got off my stool to go and greet them.

"Hi welcome you Sarah's music.... Bret? " I asked confused as ever."

" I need to ask you something outside. "

" OK I'm on my lunch break hold on let me get my bag. " I slowly got my bag tears trying not to well in my eyes as they caught the full glimpse of him. We went outside and sat on the bench.

" Why did you do it?? "

" I didn't. "

" Oh so that's great write me a letter saying you fucking cheated then I come here to try and clean the mess you made and you deny all that shit. "

Ok he crossed the line.

" You know what if you'd listen maybe you would know. I didn't write that fucking letter I never cheated on you I was very happy for once in my life. And there is no mess to clean the only mess made was when I tried to kill myself and you didn't show up to at least see if I was still fucking breathing! And I know you won't trust me when I said that i didn't write it.

And guess what I fucking wanted to be dead and I still kinda do so why don't you just finish the job and maybe I'll see my mom again. At least she would believe me. People are wanting me to get better well fucking guess what this is who I am and it's not going to change ever. I'm not a slut. I am a girl who happens to be too fucking nice and if you don't see anything I've said is true or something well you can kiss my ass! IM DONE WITH FUCKING SOCIETY! "

I screamed and ran off. He didn't run after me or anything. I ran to me and Austin's tree and swung up and pulled my knees to my chest and cried while rocking back and forth. I'm done with all this shit! I got a call it's probably Austin wondering where I might at.

" Hello? "

" What's wrong Alli? "

" Just meet me at the tree before I do something I'll regret. "

I hung up and put my phone back in my bag. I cried little longer then jumped off the branch. I went to the river and looked down. Probably about 9 ft deep. I got a rope and a rock I found near by I tied the rope to my ankle and the other side to the heavy rock. I pushed the rock into the river and I followed behind it.

I was drug under water me being about 5'9 couldn't save myself if I decided not to. I was finally to the bottom my lungs screaming at me for air. I thought in my mind my suicide letter.

To CC and Andy and rest of Bvb you all saved my life a lot but I've failed you a quit on myself I'm sorry.

To Danene forever my sister

To Austin thanks for trying to save me from the dark.

To The Relapse Symphony sorry I couldn't live to see you get more well known

And to Bret It's amazing what hurts people the most I never cheated on you I never stopped loving you.

My mind went blank and my vision went dark. The Dark consumed me again this was a friend I've visited 6 times now. More attempts this year than ever. I saw a glowing image. I walked towards it and a outline of a body showed up. It was angelic woman. It. Was. My. Mom.

Tears brimmed my eyes as the figure turned around showing her lovely green eyes like mine.

" Mom. "

" Honey didn't you read my letter. You need to be strong for the world you'll have great purpose in it one day that will save lives. "

" I did see it mom just I can't deal with hell any longer. "