This Is A Song For The Forgotten.

The Dark Is Clear

I woke up in the Window sill laying down on a pillow. I got up and trudged and got ready pulling some stuff out from my duffel bag I got a Bullet for my valentine shirt and some shorts. I did my makeup really dark and put my combat boots on and grabbed my Bvb jacket and put it on and put the hood over my head.

I waited for Danene and didn't bother to eat. Danene came down and ate some cereal and we walked there in silence. I sat at the front desk listening to my playlist while scribbling some words into my song book.

I skipped lunch break and just sat there hood up ear buds in and writing forever. Then inventory guy came by and ripped my ear buds out. I looked at him and he tried to pull my sleeves up. I wrestled him to free my wrists wincing in pain I finally freed myself.

"You're a emo whore you know that? " I nodded as tears welled in my eyes and I put my ear buds back in and continued.

Me and Danene walked home and I happened to catch a glimpse of the house at the end of the street. I shook my head and went up to my room and sat in the Window again. Then my phone rang and I wiped the tears away.

" Hello? "

" Hello you ugly bitch heard you tried to kill yourself but your little friend saved you I bet Bret would have wished you succeed. " I hung up and threw my phone and curled into a ball and cried.

I locked my door and went into the bathroom. I looked at myself makeup smudged and I was being brought back to the past of angry phone calls put down names and verbal abuse.

I pulled the sleeves of my jacket up and looked into the mirror. The words fat and ugly and emo and slut and worthless should have been tattoos in my skin by now I've been called it so many times.

I looked down and saw the tiny razor I pulled from the eyeliner sharpener I picked it up and it danced on my skin. Once I was numb I washed the blood off and dried my arms and pulled some bracelets on and pulled my sleeves back down.

I went to the closet and as I was pulling something from the top shelf a letter flew down onto the ground it was a dressed to me. I pulled it out and read.

Dear my sweet Alli,

By the time you read this I'll be long gone and in the grave. I need you to know that you are a very strong woman who has a golden heart. Any boy you find later on is very lucky. I loved you and forever will and your father. Allison be strong because the world can be very cruel and you have to take a stand. Stay strong

Love,

Abby

Abby. That was my mom. I examined it again and started to cry. I got my phone out and got on twitter.

@Allisonbvb These past two days I've done some things I haven't in awhile. I tried to commit suicide and resumed to cutting. I hope if you read this you'll never go threw this.

I dropped my phone and curled into a ball and continued to cry. Before I drug my body to the mattress I tucked the letter into my song book.

I looked at Bret's twitter and he hasn't said one thing the past two days. I went to bed and cried myself to sleep.

All my dreams consisted was voices verbally abusing me.

I woke up on the next weekend and just sat around in my room while Danene was trying to plan something out with Tyler to figure out what happened. I myself think I deserve it.

I got ready and went out the door I ran to the park and went to the willow tree and swung onto the branch and just laid there thinking of song lyrics. Writing seems to bring me out of hell and into the light.

I listened to the river that the tree was overlooking and sounded so peaceful I wish I could stay here forever and start a new life. I've been thinking of starting a band but nobody would come to tryouts.

My phone went off and I rolled my eyes and answered it.

" What! "

" We've got a plan! " Danene squealed.

" Look I don't need a reason if he thinks I'm to damaged and doesn't want me anymore I'm fine with it I'll get over it. " I hung up and cried again.

I popped in my ear buds in and listened to Days are numbered. I closed my eyes and focused on each beat each lyric the entire contents. Then my phone rang again.

" What! "

" Damn calm down its CC. "

" Hey. "

" So have you cut or anything since the last time we spoke. " I bit my lip and kept silent.

" Allison! "

" I can't help it no on gives a shit anymore and I'm back to being verbally abused by fans of The Relapse Symphony and some weird woman who called once saying she bet Bret wished I was dead. "

" You need to find out what happened. Maybe it was a mistake or something. "

" CC if he doesn't want a broken girl then he doesn't need one. "

" You aren't broken! "

" Then why does it feel like it? " He sighed and there was rustling.

" Allison listen to me you need to stop find out where you belong because if he kicked you out and won't give a reason then he doesn't deserve you. You are strong and I know it. " Andy said.

" Thanks Andy. " We hung up and i continued what i was doing then I went back home when the sun started to set. I looked at the house on the end of the street and his bedroom light was on I shook my head once more and walked back and up to my room.

@+,:'(+,_!#$/:'#@$_!#@

Sorry it's short I'm trying here I've got a plan though.