The Sewing Queen

Stress and understanding

Chapter 10

When you spend the whole week thinking about one thing, your mind wonders through thoughts of decisions you made in the past and if you did the right thing then. First real big decision I had to make was how I was going live my life, from my birth the press was on my mum and dad asking them all about me. Thinking about it, they went through a lot to keep me a secret and they always said to everyone that if I wanted to allow the world of media and let the press into my life I could when I thought I was ready. We had talked about it a lot and decided that the summer I left school would be the time we would hold a party with all my mum and dad's closest friends and all the family that doesn't know who the Rose child is. The only family I know is my grandparents and my mum's brother.

The decision to keep my personal life away from my school life has been the best decision I have ever made. But the decision to move schools and start working at Heartly is a completely different situation. It's always been my dream to work at the fashion designers then to go on to own my own.

The only thoughts going through my head is what happens if it's too soon? Am I ready? Is it too early? Will I have to tell everyone at school the real reason why I am leaving? Can I lie to Abbie?

"Lucie?" Link's voice called from the hallway, sending my thoughts to the back of my head.

"Hello?" I said sleepily as Link entered the room.

"Hey, you look a mess! Have you been sleeping?"

"Oh that's really what I want to hear from my boyfriend. Beauty doesn't come naturally" I said sarcastically.

"Well, I'm only worried about you"

"Don't be I am fine" I lied, the stress of this decision was eating me alive and everyone else thought I was being selfish as I was making them wait.

"That's the biggest lie I have heard leave your mouth!"

"No, I'm serious! I'm fine!"

"Lucie, don't lie"

"I'm not lying" I protested, sounding like a two year old who stole chocolate from the kitchen cupboard and now has it all over my face but still arguing the fact that I didn't take it.

"Lucie, the bags under your eyes tell a different story!"

"That's because their someone else's!"

"Are you sleeping for someone else then?"

"What? That's not even possible! I didn't mean it like that"

"Oh ok"

"Now, sorry to be a party pooper but I have to get on with my textiles homework!" I said playing the homework card trying to make him leave. It works on everyone else.

"I'll help you"

"No, go home Link"

"Why you being like this?"

"Because I'm tried and stressed and it seems everything everyone does today is annoying me!"

"Why you so stressed?"

"Link. Please. I don't want to talk about it"

"Lucie, you know that isn't going to happen. I came round to talk to you and I'm not leaving till I have done just that"

"What do you want to talk about?"

"Tell me why you're stressed first. Get it off your chest, it will help"

"No, you first"

"No you"

"No you"

"No Link, you first"

"Lucie"

"Link"

"Come on just spill"

"After you have"

"Lucie whatever is bothering you it is not going to make me run screaming. You're no monster! Tell me and I will help you"

"No, Link it really doesn't matter. It's just stupid school stuff"

"No it isn't! I know you better than that"

"It is"

"Lucie?"

"Link?"

"Lucie please!"

"Link I can go on for hours,"

"So can I. I'm not giving up till you tell me"

"We will test that" I said starting some work that was sat on my desk. I know he has come round to see me, to try and get me to say yes but I was really worried about everything other than the job. He doesn't realise how much stress and trouble it will cause, no one seems to understand.

**

Link sat on my bed for about ten minutes while I completed a maths worksheet I had. Looking at him through the mirror above my desk it was eating him up by me not telling him but it was hurting me to watch him care so much and just push him aside because I didn't want any attention.

I got up and jumped onto his lap, wrapping my arms around his neck.

"Right, I'm going to come clean about what is getting me all stressed but can you do me a favour and not speak till I'm finished?"

"Yeah, of course"

"Right, I'm stressed because instead of thinking about the job, I've been thinking about what happens when the press finds out about me and how I am going to tell my school friends and everything else in my life that will change. Because the job is my dream and might only seem small to you but it will be a massive change in my life. Everything will come crashing around me; the press will be all over my story for weeks and then what happens if they find out we are dating? Not that I don't love that. But I will be in the limelight again then and everyone knows how much I hate being the centre of attention." I said taking a deep breath; I tried to spit it all out at once so by the time I had finished I was out of breath.

"Lucie, I didn't know you felt like that and I don't think any of us thought about the press and all that. We all just thought you would say yes and be really happy; it was a shock when you asked to think about it but I understand now. You should have just said something straight away but we will find a way to keep it quiet. I promise"

"I think I need to call everyone round to tell everyone my decision"

"Which is?"

"You will have to wait a see"

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So will all of you. Just a small cliff-hanger there J don't hate me! I have uploaded todaybecauee it makes up for next thursday when I am on my silver DofE. ...nwish me luck!

hope you liked it, please let me know what you think.

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Zo x