Spaces || HS ✔️

Chapter 10

July 3rd, 2018- 3 years ago

Harry Styles,

I miss you too. I miss you so crazily much that I cannot even think without having you on my mind. It sounds quite obsessive to me, but it is the truth. I miss you, and I can't stop thinking about you.

Everything here has been alright, I guess. I haven't really talked to Niall much except at parties, but I have hung out with Louis a couple times for lunch and also at parties. I haven't been out much to be honest. A few parties here and there, but besides that, I have been writing all day on the couch.

The crazy part is Emma and Chelsea have been there at each party I have been to, strangely. They have been eyeing and glaring at me, but I just ignore it. Everything is over, and they are not worth my time.

I hate for the late reply, but I just got your letter. I don't get my mail much because I always forget to somehow. The damn mailbox is right in plain sight and I just ignore it, well used to. I will be looking in it each day now, just waiting for your letter and to hear all about your adventure.

That's how I want to think about this fourteen month tour, an adventure. Quite a dangerous and lethal adventure, but it is way better than what I used to think of it as.

I am going to be honest, I have gotten quite lazy since you left. Right after you left, Niall texted me and asked if I wanted to go to a party with him, so I did. I did because I didn't want to think about what had happened earlier, but I couldn't keep you off my mind right?

You invaded my thoughts every second of every minute, Harry, and I couldn't change that. I guess it is better to have you in my thoughts all the time rather than none. After that party with Niall, I've only been to about four, and I haven't even drank much, which is good I guess. Wow, sorry, that was random.

Currently, it is around seven at night and I am sitting on the couch, eating cold pizza. I am not a fan of cold pizza, but that was the only thing in the fridge. I've been a little tight on my money because of that damn air conditioner and heater that are not working.

Pizza is good, though. I have been writing all day for today, and suddenly, a thunderstorm struck upon this overcrowded city. It has been storming quite lately, but it helped me recognise my mailbox.

I was walking outside to drop off my trash, but the wind had picked up. It blew everywhere and suddenly, the shutter of the mailbox just dropped. It caught my eye and you can probably guess the rest. I dropped off my trash, got the letter, read the letter, and here I am. Funny how things you just pop up out of nowhere and suddenly, everything just changes.

After reading your wonderful and exquisite letter, I kept thinking: I don't have a nickname for Harry. All the you went through writing that letter, the only thing that was on my fucking mind was I didn't have a damn nickname for you. I hate my name. I hate my name, but I feel like 'El' is better, I don't know why. I guess because it's shorter sounding and doesn't have that extra syllable. I don't know, I'm weird. I was thinking about a couple names for you after that whole dilemma.

How about Harold? I bet you will be either making fun of me or extremely pissed off once you see these. Hershel? Hershey? Okay, I know 'Hershey' is probably too much for you, but I honestly love it. Hershey is such a great chocolate. How about H? H just seems original to me, though, now that I think about it. It's just a letter of the alphabet, but you're opinion might differ.

I was thinking about Harriet, but I feel like you would be quite offended because I am pretty sure that is a girls' name. The things I think about in my spare time, it's just random. I just want you to know, I really like Hershey.

I'm deeply sorry that you're away from your family, Harry, so sorry. I know it's hard, but you have got to be strong. Everybody says this shit about how you're brave, but you just got started from what I read in the letter.

You have got to prove yourself and show how brave and strong you are. I sure know it from when you were with me, but now you're not. You really should be keeping up with where you are. Ah, who am I kidding? I don't even know where I am half the time or am living in.

I don't want you to think about the time, Hershey. Yes! It sounded right to me, but anyways, I don't want you to think about how much time you have until you see everybody and come back.

I want you to think of it as soon, but you don't have to. I'm not doing a countdown, but I'm sure as hell not acting like I don't care when you don't come back. I do care, Harry, and I hope you know that. I care so much, so fucking much.

You were right, I am alright... I guess. I have been writing non-stop, no kidding. My main focus has been on poems though, strangely, and I don't know why. When I was younger, I hated writing poems so much. The rhyming and wording was always so difficult for me and it still is. I now find it extremely exciting.

Literature was never my choice, but things change right? And yes, you are correct. I won't be showing anyone anything of my writings. They are so bad, and I just need to edit and work more on them. But, I would absolutely love to read yours, Harry. You say you're terrible at your words, but I don't believe you. Of course I don't believe you. My writing will still be a mystery.

That's not a surprise that you didn't remember their names, Harry. They're your commanders for God's sake and you don't remember them! But, like I said, that's not a surprise. I hate that the mail for you guys only send out every two weeks, but at least I get to talk to you, like you said.

I'm glad you met somebody that you really enjoy. You are right though, I'm not laughing. But, you gave made me smile through this whole fucking letter and that's the best thing anyone has ever done to me. You should feel proud, Harry Styles.

I would love to hear more about him, though, because nobody really seems to make you laugh much, no offense, Harry. I don't see you laugh enough, and I would love to hear more about this Owen.

Aww, Harry, I literally teared up reading this part. Well you know how sensitive I am to these kind of cheesy things, well not actually cheesy. I miss you, Harry. There's not words to describe how much I miss you. This is just the beginning, but I will see you soon.

Now, you got your letter, but I'm going to be waiting these long days to look forward to this: you, your words, everything involving you. I'm glad I got you to think. I got, THE HARRY STYLES, to think?! You don't understand how much I freaked out when I read that, but I did.

I miss you, Harry Styles, but I'll see you soon.

El Parker

P.S. What the hell are the little x's for? I tried looking on the internet, but that failed. What the hell are they?

Hiiii, sorry for the late update. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. Let me know what you think. I've been really busy, so hopefully I will have time to update next week. Please vote and comment.

Votes: 10
COMMENTS: 15
Thank you so much for everything as always. Soon...
-M