Troglodytic (Yaoi BoyXBoy)

Part 9: Relationship「Yuki」

Part 9: Relationship

Two months has passed by since I've gotten into a relationship with Koji Sawara. We would meet up at his office, and sometimes even his house to fuck around. It honestly felt like meaningless sex to me. I didn't feel love towards him. If anything, he was obsessed with me, but I was not reciprocating the feeling.

"Yuki, what would you like to do for the weekend? I am free." He says as he cuddles me in his bed.

"I don't know."

He sighs. "You still don't talk much, and we have been together for two months. What can I do to make you happy?"

"I don't know. I am happy just the way things are right now so yeah." My mind was so unsure about everything, but I wanted to let it linger longer to see if it will work out between us. I wanted to feel happy. I wanted to feel the feeling of being in love.

"Well I will do anything to make you smile." He kisses my forehead.

"Thanks."

He frowns. I knew he didn't like the way I am. Maybe he is just keeping me for the sex. I wouldn't blame him. I wasn't the most interesting to be with, and I don't see any reason for him to like me otherwise.

"I got you a present." He gets off the bed, and goes to his closet. He pulls out a medium sized box, and placed it on the bed. "Have a look. I hope you like it." He smiles softly.

I took the box, and slowly tore the wrapping paper. This was my first gift ever. I felt so happy, but I didn't know how to express it. Koji has done a lot of things I've dreamed of having from a lover. It made me happy, but I didn't feel like I was in love.

I pulled out a box, and looked at it. It was a smartphone. I've never had a cellphone before. My jaw dropped mildly, and I looked up at him. "Thank you. Really." I wanted to act more surprised, but my dull personality couldn't.

"You're welcome. This way, we can text each other." He scoots over, and pulls out the manual. "I can teach you how to do everything. It will be fun."

"Okay." I watched as he turned on the phone, and started pressing all the digital buttons. It was amusing, and I was intrigued by this small device. I was always jealous of all the kids that had a cellphone, and now I don't have to be.

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We spent a majority of the evening fiddling with the cellphone. Koji finally dropped me off at my apartment, and I went to my rabbit instantly when I locked the door.

"Oni guess what?!" I showed Oni my new cellphone. "Koji gave me a cellphone. It is so thin, and it's black so I look rich! I love it!" I hugged it. "He is the best boyfriend ever, but I just don't love him." I frowned. "Oni why can't I love him?"

My rabbit simply looked at me, and went to sit next to my hand that had the cellphone. He starts nibbling on my finger.

"Hey quit that!" I joked with him, and poked his nose. "Maybe I am wrong for using him for money. Then again...even if he was broke, it wouldn't matter to me." I had a lot of thoughts I couldn't contain. Help me Oni...help me figure out what I want with my dull life.

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The next morning I woke, and saw I had a text message from Koji. He was the only contact I had on the phone. I looked at it.

"Hey sweetie, want to go on a date? My treat to you is a ice cream cone."

I texted back.

"Sure. When will you pick me up?"

"In about an hour. Get dressed beautiful."

I held the phone tightly. I love the affection. I want to feel something. I really do.