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Heartaches And Miseries

If she's amazing, she won't be easy.

If she's easy, she won't be amazing.

If she's worth it, you won't give up.

If you give up, you're not worth it.

Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you;

you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.

***

It's been a week since huli kaming nagka usap ni Glaiza. I never saw her again after that. Hindi ko na sya nakita ulit sa University. Kahit sa Literature class namin, hindi rin sya pumapasok. Gusto kong tanungin ang prof namin kung anong paalam ni Glaiza sa hindi nito pagpasok but many times I hold back. I know she doesn't want me in her life. Maliwanag nyang ipinaramdam sa'kin 'yun nung huli naming pag uusap. Pero gusto ko lang malaman kung ano na bang nangyayari sa kanya. Basta alam kong ok sya, ok na din ako.

Hindi na ko nakatiis kaya tinanong ko na si Chynna kung bakit hindi umaattend ng class namin si Glaiza. I'm sure she knows her whereabouts because they've been friends for quite sometime.

       "Chynna, what happened to her? Bakit hindi sya pumapasok?" Tanong ko kay Chynna after our class.

Napakunot noo si Chynna. Sandaling nag isip. Marahil hindi agad nagets kung sino ang tinutukoy ko.

       "Si Glaiza ba?" Tanong nya. Tumango lang ako bilang pagsang ayon.

       "Sa totoo lang hindi ko din alam kung bakit one week na syang absent. Wala din kase akong balita sa kanya. Pasensya na R, wala akong maibigay na info sa'yo."

I don't believe her pero hinayaan ko na lang sya. How come she didn't know what happened to Glaiza? Hindi ko alam kung bakit kailangang magsinungaling sa'kin ni Chynna. Simple lang naman ang tanong ko.Gusto ko lang malaman kung ok sya. Hindi ko naman na sya guguluhin. Sinabihan nya ba si Chynna na hwag sabihin sa'kin ang anumang bagay na may kinalaman sa kanya? The thought of it hurt me even more. That says a lot. She want me to get out of her life completely.

***

       "Tsong, tinanong ka sa'kin ni R kanina. Bakit daw hindi ka pumapasok?" It was Chynna. Araw araw nya kong dinadalaw after class simula ng umabsent ako a week ago.