dear hope,
i'm sorry. i had to end your last letter short. uh, hah. i had another anxiety attack, hope. i am sorry.
it is still too much.
i keep reading the 'letters' you left me. over and over and over again. they make me cry, so much. i wish you never would have had to write them.
i wish you were still here. you would have made it so far, hope. so far.
i miss you, and i know i always will.
and hope, that sucks.
it's funny how all of those promises mean nothing now. absolutely nothing. it hurts so much, hope. so god damn much.
i did it again, hope. it stings, but i can almost hear your voice again. and hope, that is keeping me sane. hah, as sane as i can be.
sorry. that is what it says. and i am, hope. i am sorry. so, so, so sorry.
are you really still with me? i hope so. you promised me i would never, ever lose you.
dammit, dammit, dammit!
i love you.
love,
heaven rae
