Forever (GirlXGirl)

Chapter Seven

Again the dream is vivid. If it wasn't for the pink cloud we are laying on I would almost think that it were real. The scent in the air reminds me of cinnamon, slowly wrapping its way around my nose and invading all of my other senses. My fingers are inside of Melody, and she is rocking her hips back and fourth against my hand, arching her back and moaning loudly. She has never been more beautiful to me than she is right now, and that is really saying something since I'm pretty sure that she is a Goddess gracing the Earth with her presence. Melody's stomach is  glistening with sweat, and her breathing is heavy and desperate, as if she not only wants me, but needs me. She holds onto me as she climax's, her legs shaking and eyes closed tightly as I keep my fingers working. The sounds of her screams echo through the room, as if we were in some deep, secret cave, and I cant help but smile at the pure pleasure that I am able to provide  her.

Once Melody is done and can no longer take it she pulls away from me and switches the position so that her face is between my legs, she wastes no time and without time to take a breath her tongue is flicking against me, making me gasp and moan in pleasure. I feel myself get wet, and my body instinctively grinds against her mouth as she shows me exactly how much she's loves me. It isn't long before my back arches and I orgasm harder than I ever have before. Melody looks up at me with he award winning smile, and slowly makes her way up, gliding her naked body against mine, until she is in my arms.

This has to be a glimpse inside of my own personal heaven.

                                       •••

This time when I wake up I try desperately to make myself go back to sleep, so that I can go back into the dream and be with Melody in a way that I don't think I'll ever get the nerve to make happen in reality. I can feel a bead of sweat make it's way from my forehead quickly down the side of my cheek and I wipe it away with the back of my hand.

For a while it seems like the hours just tick by, but when I look at the clock I see that it has only been ten minutes since I woke up covered in sweat and quivering somewhere inside of me that I'm pretty sure I've never quivered before.

It's three o'clock in the morning and there is no hope of me falling back asleep, I feel like I just chugged an energy drink. I think about getting out of bed and going to make myself a snack, then I imagine myself attempting to make it down the stairs on my crutches in the dark and decide it's probably not worth the risk of killing myself. I need to get a little bell or something to ring so that my mom knows when I'm hungry.

The thought of my mothers face if I actually rang a bell to ask for something frightens me and makes me laugh at the same time, a good distraction from Melody and all of the stress that she doesn't even know she's causing me. It's crazy to think that she's probably out with someone else, kissing them, thinking about them, and here I am obsessing over her when we've never so much as held hands.

For the last few months I've honestly thought about finding a therapist, maybe if one that could change me, make me normal. I've read about them and have seen them on tv, but to be honest it all seems like a crock to me. If I was born this way how could I learn to just stop and ever truly be happy?

No, I think that for now the sleepless nights are worth it for the little bit of time that I get I spend with Melody inside of my imagination.

                                       •••

The radio blares and I wake sit up groggily. I'm not sure what time my mind finally gave out and let me get some rest, but I know that it wasn't very long ago. I might have to invest in some sleeping pills to combat my swimming heart and wild imagination.

"You up?" I hear my mom ask from outside of my door.

"Yea, I'll be right you!" I say, getting up from my bed and hoping over to my dresser to find something to wear. You'd be surprised how much longer it takes to get ready when you have to wear a cast, don't even get me started on how much longer it takes me to get down my stairs.

After what feels like two hours later I finally make it to the bottom of my stairs covered in sweat and breathing heavily, guess it's a good thing I decided to skip the makeup today. My mother looks at me from the stove and lets out a chuckle.

"Oh yea, hahaha I don't need help or anything mom, don't worry about me." I say sarcastically, she brings her coffee cup up to her lips and takes a loud sip.

"Oh ok good, because I wasn't." She says, then smiles at me which I return. My mom has always been my best friend, she is the smartest and strongest women that I know. My dad left when I was only two months old and she's been doing it by herself ever since, my grandparents had died when my mom was only eleven in a car accident and she was raised by her aunt that really couldn't care less about her. She shoved it in everyone's faces by working her ass off and becoming one of the highest paid lawyers in our area.

"Are you sure you're ready to go back? I'm fine with you staying here until you get your cast off." She let's me know. I think about it, and while the offer is enticing I know that if I get too far behind it's really going to bring down my GPA. One thing about having a mother as successful as mine is that I am constantly striving to be just as good, if not better, or else I feel like I'm not good enough in my moms eyes. She always tells me that she did it all with nothing, so I should be able to achieve whatever I want with everything.

"I'm sure, I don't want to get too far behind. Besides I'm going crazy inside this house by myself." I tell her as I make my way over to the fruit bowl and start to unpeel a banana for breakfast. My mom nods and looks down at her news paper. With her being a lawyer the only time that we really see each other are these early mornings. I actually have been waking up hours earlier than I have to ever since I was twelve just so that I could spend a little extra time with her.

As I look at my mother the wild thought to tell her what's been going on with me crosses my mind. I wish more than anything that I could confide in her. Tell her what's been going on with me, that I'm terrified I'm losing my mind. My mom is pretty open minded, just not when it comes to me. She wouldn't care if I had a car friend, or even if one of our relatives comes out of the closet. But I know that if I did it all hell would break lose, and honestly, I'm kind of afraid to shatter her perfect view of me.

One of the worst feelings on earth is having to hide who you really are from the people that you love the most.