Undauntedheartkim's Critiques

Beyond The Facade - stormhunter07

Author: stormhunter07
Title: Beyond The Facade
Genre: Teen Fiction

REVIEW: Is she really a tomboy as in, into girl to girl? Or just a boyish girl, some kind of a
girl who dresses and sometimes behaves the way boys are expected to but still a girls heart? Nothing just asking hahaha. Because I just remembered I experienced a french kissed with a girl!

Anyways, heheh! You are so careful in typing, I only noticed few typo errors.

At first I thought It's boring, like a boy meets girl, quarreling like dogs and cats and will end up sweet lovers. It wasn't exactly a "draw me in" sort of start but as I continued to read on it began to slowly gain my interest. I think twiced of reading it or not, really, but of course I have too. And glad I did. Well actually on your summary, the reason behind how she became like that, interests me. And I must say that one of the good things in your story is its being unpredictable. Unlike some of the stories I read, you already know what will happen next, so predictable. Leave me feeling psychic genius hahah!

I am amazed for you know how to make people laugh, just a little more, you can make them burst out to laughter. And the convo with your brother, It's touching. Just a little more again, lengthening the conversation,(I can see that you can)you can make readers cry.

You know what is imaginitive writing is. I see the clarity in your story. It doesn't confuse people, some kind of not living the reader in the dark.

As a begginer, 4 thumbs up for you! Can't wait to read the next part!!! The mistery beyond the facade. Heheh!

-undauntedheartkim/cat_ones