The Stepbrother's Girl

Chapter 18:: Decisions

When we arrived home mom and Ray give me the disapproving look. The 'that's what you get when you love your step-brother'. Levi has been there for me though and I appreciate it. Blake hadn't called, texted, or anything in two weeks he's been a no show. This all seems too old.

"You have to come out sometime Aria." Levi presses. "Your mom told me to tell you that you two are leaving in the morning and I want to see you before you leave."

A long silence as I whisper. "Come in." He opens the door as I lie there on my bed regretting letting him in.
"It's okay Aria he's not worth the tears."
"Levi you don't understand..." I cry into my pillow as he slowly makes his way over to me and embraces me in a hug. One of those warm sensitive hugs that leaves you feeling safe. A wave of emotions running through my mind and all I can feel is... safe.

Levi. Levi Moore. He pulls away from the hug slightly and looks me in my eyes, and I give him the satisfaction of returning his gaze. Moments pass as we exchange guilt, sadness, and pure desire all through a stare. Then he kisses me. My heart stops as it stings with butterflies, he's always given me those damn butterflies. His warm lips against mine once again but this time it feels different. This time it feels like he needs this. I need this. But should I?

I pull away as I'm greeted with defeat in his eyes, it hurts me... Do I still love Levi? I can't deny the feelings I have for him. I wrap my hands around the nape of his neck as I press my lips his into another kiss. He wraps his arms around me and swoops me off of me feet deepening the kiss. Is this wrong? If it were why does it feel so good...

His tongue seeks entrance to my mouth as I let him. He walks me over to the bed as we fall onto it softly.
"Aria..."
He mutters.
"Levi?" I say breathing heavily.
"I love you, and I know it's not the best time but when is the best time when the girl you love is leaving your life. I know it's not fair, but I've wanted you for a long time and I just never knew it. I know it's even more unfair because it is true. Blake made me realize, I can't lose you even if you do chose him or whatever you do chose. Aria I will always love you." His words ring in my ears... Levi couldn't even imagine how long I've dreamed of him how long I wished I could be with him. I would have done anything for this moment, but a feeling in my gut is still empty and I can't figure out why...

Shouldn't I be complete and happy, I'm also moving to an amazing beach state I should be ecstatic. As I'm lost in thought I return to the real world, here with Levi. I kiss him as he's on top of me in my bed. He runs his fingers through my hair as he softly kisses me slowly swirling his tongue around mine. I slowly feel his bulge against my leg. I rub my leg against it as he starts struggling he bites my lip causing me to let out a soft moan against his lips.
"I want you so bad." He says in a low tone. My heart starts beating fast as my body feels as if it were melting. He has this affect on me still? Will it be indefinite his affect over me?

I can't deny it any longer. I reach for his belt as he pulls away slowly and looks me in my eyes.
"Are you sure?" He asks as I nod.
With that he continues to kissing me as he starts unbuckling himself and removing his clothes. He starts sliding my shirt of revealing my bra. He takes a moment to take in the moment and traces my collarbone with his finger softly all the way down to my pants. He begins removing them as he kisses my collarbone then he begins kissing my breast. We're now both in our underwear.

He slides his fingers across my bra strap as if asking permission for a second time. I slide my bra of exposing my breast as he begins kissing them. I moan as he does so and I feel his bulge very strong on my crotch. This is it. He slides my underwear off as he begins to kiss my stomach then slowly begins to kiss downwards until he's, doing what Blake did to me that felt so amazing.

I begin to uncontrollably moan softly into my pillow trying to be quiet. He continues to make fireworks explode in my mind as he keeps going. He finally wants his turn as I feel him slide inside me we both make eye contact. My lips slightly part as he begins to slowly thrust.
"Fuck Aria, you feel amazing."
He whispers as he kisses my neck trailing to my lips and begins kissing me deeply. I kiss him back as I let the moment happen. Levi and I are having sex and there's no taking that back. What the future hold I have no clue but no doubt it's going to be messy. What have I done and why can't I just chose...

We lay there for a few moments still naked from our nefarious act. He both just pant slowly and hold each other.
"Levi?" I say not really wanting to know the answer.
"What's wrong Ari?" He knows me too well.
"What's gonna happen when I leave?"
"I'm not sure, but what I am sure is I won't forget about you we can FaceTime and we can even plan visits. We can do long distance."
And it hits me. I've only been looking for more pain from the inevitable answer of that being I'll lose all the people I love. I'm just selfish and I've hurt them both and now they both have to lose me. And they've probably lost each other. I have so much guilt for what's happened.

"No." I say coldly.
"No?" He says confused.
"I can't ask you to not have someone else or to not experience life to its fullest because you're waiting on me."
"I wouldn't be experiencing life to its fullest if I didn't fight as hard as I could for the girl I love." He says as I break down in tears. A needed cry. He just holds me as he caresses me.
"I know it hurts trust me, but it can work and I just need to know you want it to work. I know you love Blake, and Blake knows you love me. We are brothers and we always will be and we agreed to let you pick, whichever you pick I will still love you Aria."

He's right. And I can't have them both. And I'm not even sure if Blake would even want me I'm not sure who I even want. I need air. I need a sign. I need anything to get my mind off of what I can't define.
"I will have a decision made by morning before I leave." I say as he nods. I have a decision to make and it's not a cute one. I wonder where Blake even is. I feel heartbroken because honestly I wish Blake were here right now. He just doesn't have the right way of expressing his emotions. I guess no one really does. That's society and mental health for you I guess.

The day nears an end as my mom is making dinner and Ray is playing with my baby sister. My heart breaks as I see them... they have to be happy and my mom seems happy... I ruined it all. Go figure. I always do. We're all sitting there content, a little tension and then the door slings open and in comes Blake, huffy and puffy. He spots me and his death stare takes over his eyes then instantly turns soft. He takes his self back and slicks his fingers through his hair and softly chuckles. He walks past everyone and goes straight to his room. My heart breaks into a million pieces as I fight back tears. I thought he cared. I thought he would at least talk to me. I leave tomorrow and he seems to have no intention to talk to me. So I will return the same energy. Maybe he never even cared and just wanted what Levi had. Levi always had me, Blake used me... and I'm slowly realizing that.

***story pause***
I'll update soon here's a glimpse of the new chapter.
Update update so I had this saved but it was pretty mature so I was scared to update but now it's okay! Hope you enjoy I intend to finish the story it should have four to five more chapters maybe!