A Harry Potter and Pirates of the Caribbean Crossover

Actually I've Done This Before

Takua rowed for hours stopping occasionally to wrap Kat's mouth in seaweed again. The witch, hungry and desperate had begun chewing on the green and purple vegetation. Eventually she had come to like the taste of the seaweed and kelp the undead woman used to bind her with.

"What do you want with me?" Kat managed out once.

The woman ceased her rowing and pressed her hand to Kat's stomach yet again and then to her own mutilated one. "Keiki!" Takua gagged Kat's mouth again. "Keiki."

After so many hours of rowing Kat was relieved when she spotted land. Then she realized what island it was. She began to wiggle excitedly. There were two pirates she was sure would help her. Takua slid out of the canoe to pull it to shore.

When the horrid woman was out of arms reach, Kat bit through the gag yet again. "Jack! Barbossa! Help! He..." Kat's screams were cut off as Takua knocked her out of the small vessel. She was deceptively strong pulling Kat spluttering and gasping out of the water and dragging her on shore.

The two pirates stared as the zombie like woman dragged the familiar woman onto the beach. Takua continued dragging her through the jungle back to her tomb where she tied the poor witch to the slab that was her own final resting place. The zombie woman gazed at her satisfied before shuffling back out.

"Should we follow?" Jack asked back at the beach pointing into the jungle.

Barbossa half closed his eyes. Rescuing young women were for Navy men and blacksmiths not pirates. "Aye," he finally said. "We have nothing better to do." 'And we might get off this island if we save her.'

"Oh good then," Jack said cheerfully. "After you."

Barbossa rolled his eyes and began limping off into the jungle aided by his retrieved crutch. "Damn you, Sparrow. You know it's possible they may blame us for this."

"I was only searching for me gold."

"Ye lost it again?"

"Someone keeps stealing it, Hector." Jack said accusingly.

"Why would I be wanting yer gold? What am I going to spend it on, merpeople's goods? Hmm?"

Jack paused. He had never thought of why he wanted the gold. "Maybe." He replied. "Or maybe you could barter with them for freedom."

"Shh!" Barbossa hissed. They had arrived just as Takua was shuffling out of her tomb. They crouched in the underbrush watching her move off.

"That's me scarf." Jack hissed.

Takua froze and turned around. Barbossa groaned as she began shuffling their way. He pulled himself up to hobble away when he was suddenly struck by a coconut in the back of the head. He fell face first into the undergrowth. Jack jumped up and held his hands up.

"Parley?"

Takua threw another of the fruit knocking Jack out as well.

Both men woke up slowly. They had been bound with jungle vines to a bamboo pole each. The poles were propped against the wall at the head of Kat's stone bed. She was looking up at them upside down from her place tied to the slab.

"So much for being rescued." She hissed to them. Her mouth and nightshirt were covered in mangoes and other mashed up fruit. Takua had been trying to force feed her prisoner.

"Where is the beastie?" Jack asked.

"Outside," Kat snapped. She looked away from them and sniffed a little.

Jack's eyes widened and he began to struggle. He succeeded in falling forward so that he was suspended between the wall and the floor with one end of the pole digging into the ground the other resting by Kat's head.

"You ARE the worst pirate I ever heard of." She snapped.

"You're only saying that because the former Commodore told you to sat that." Jack snapped. Kat sniffed even more trying not to cry. "Oh." Jack moaned. "Oh I didn't mean it. Come on please don't cry."

"I-I can't help it. She's going to chop up the two of you and force feed you to me. Then in about seven months she's going to take my baby!"

Jack and Barbossa winced. Neither of them were cruel enough to kill women having babies or babies themselves.

"Now, now, Lass. There be no proof of that." Barbossa said. "And we'll find a way out. We always do."

"Actually, I've done this before. So no worries." Jack said with a grin. He rocked his body until he crashed to the floor. "I know what I'm doing." He muttered from the floor.

Just then Takua shuffled back in the tomb. Jack rolled over. "Keiki." He said.

Takua froze and muttered in her native tongue. Jack repeated the word. Takua replied back. They went back and forth like this for some time. Each time Jack added more words to his vocabulary and Takua gave him more words. In very little time he was speaking full sentences with her.

"Amazing," Barbossa muttered.

Kat watched as suddenly Takua cut Jack's bonds loose. He jumped up and motioned to Barbossa. She cut his bonds as well. Jack then motioned to Kat. Takua shook her head.

"You're right, darling," Jack said sadly. "She wants that baby. There is nothing we can do... right now. She believes us to be gods and she will leave us be for now."

Kat sighed. "Thank you, Jack." She said sadly.

"You're welcome." He said softly. "And don't worry we'll think of something."

"Just tell her I will let her know when I am hungry and... other things."

"Aye," Jack said. Takua muttered something and Jack motioned Barbossa out of the tomb. "We best be going back to the beach before she changes her mind... what's left of it..."

Takua grunted. She had a half coconut filled with warm water. She used a ripped piece of Jack's scarf to clean Kat's face of the remains of the food. When she was done she put her ear to Kat's stomach and muttered that word again. She lifted the night shirt and put her hand on Kat's stomach.

Kat wriggled uncomfortably. The creature was truly undead. Her hands were cold and clammy. Her skin was rough and flaky. Kat understood that it was likely because of her exposure to the sun. Kat only hoped that she might flake completely away before she came to term.

This situation was not how Kat had pictured her pregnancy going. She had pictured herself blooming and being pampered by James. She pictured giving birth in the best room at St. Mungo's Hospital. James would have stood by her side. Madam Pomfrey would hand the perfectly wrapped baby to James who would then hand her their child to her to feed.

Takua left her and closed up the tomb behind her leaving Kat in the cool darkness. Kat sobbed. She wasn't even going to make it to full term like this.

"James..." she moaned.