After Ever After

The Walk

Maxon POV
I walk out to the garden waiting for America, I slowly pace around thinking what could be the key memory. I think hard and long but nothing seems to come and since America doesn't remember anything I have almost given up hope but I won't for Jacobs sake and for my happiness.
But I have to take the proper precautions if she doesn't remember, will she still want to live in the castle, will she still want to be with me. I don't know I can't even begin to think what will happen if she doesn't remember.
I'm so deep I thought I don't even hear the quiet foot steps approach until I feel a tap on my shoulder, I jump not realizing its America.
"I'm sorry I didn't mean to scare you" she says clasping her hands tightly together.
"Don't worry it's fine darling" I say slowly unclasping her hands and holding them in my own.
"We need to talk about something" She says dropping my hands and turning her back on me.
"What is it" I says moving next to her.
"Well what if I don't get my memories back Maxon what will do?" She asks looking worried.
"Don't think that way America, you can't give up hope" I say looking away from her hopeless face.
"I'm not giving up hope Maxon I'm just thinking logically" she says lifting my chin so my eyes can meet hers.
"You thinking logically, well there's a first time for everything." I say sarcastically.
"And what's that supposed to mean" she says crossing her arms over her chest.
I look at her face and I see I immediately made a mistake I quickly scan my brain to look for an excuse or a funny joke to say but I think of nothing. Maybe she needs a little tough love it's not like America did anything anyone ever told her when they were speaking nicely, the old America would need a push and that's exactly what I'm going to do.
"Well when you had your memories you weren't exactly the most logical of people, you would never think before you spoke or acted. During the selection you were almost kicked out a couple of times based on your very un-logical actions." I say.
"WELL AT LEAST I HAD MEMORIES DURING THE SELECTION I KNEW WHO I WAS DURING THE SELECTION I HAD A PERSONALITY I HAD A HISTORY. YOU..." She broke off and I could see she was starting to break, I think I might have pushed a bit to hard. I am about to apologize but she starts to talk.
"You don't know what it's like when people who you are supposed to know, people your supposed to love walk in through that hospital door and stare at you and look at you like they expect you to remember everything if they send you enough flowers or show you enough pictures and videos or tell you everything you did as a child or every mistake you made. You don't know what it's like to look into the eyes of someone you feel for and see constant disappointment because you can't do something right" she says, her eyes briefly flick towards mine before looking back down at the ground.
"Well I do in a way, my father never thought I was fit to be king. He would train me but everything he told me to do I did it but when I reported back he would look at me as if I couldn't be his son the disappointment in his eyes ripped me from the inside out I felt as if I would never live up to his standards. But look at me America I proved him wrong I have a beautiful loving wife and beautiful healthy little boy and a kingdom that is thriving in every way possible." I say desperately trying to give her something to hang on to a hope that she could live by.
"I'm... I'm sorry Maxon I just, I don't know if I can keep doing this" she says I clearly see tears threatening to spill over but she doesn't let them fall, and that is where I see my first glimpse of the old America, the America that would stay strong no matter what happened, the America that would carry the weight of the entire country on her shoulders so that she could balance everything and everyone out.
"If you don't want to do this anymore I will stop,-" I see her breathe a sigh of relief. "But you have to answer this one question" I say holding my breathe.
"Fine" she says not even glancing my way.
"Do you feel something towards me?" I ask.
"What?" She says and I know I caught her off guard.
"When you look at me can you honestly tell me that you don't care about me, that you don't feel a potential love there. Because if you don't then I will let you start a new life somewhere far from the castle where you never have to see me or Jacob again." I say quickly.
"Well I don't think you have to go that far Maxon" she says looking worried.
"No, I do because if there is any America left in you than you will fight for us no matter what we have to go through. Because when I look at you I feel something in my chest that makes me what to take you in my arms and never let go, even though we have been married for a couple of years and we have a child everything you walk through a door my heart still flutters just to see you near me. And every time I make you smile it gives me this sense of joy that nothing could compare to. But if what makes you happy is to leave me than I will do as you ask, but you have to answer my question." I say looking at her anxiously.
"Maxon" she looks me directly in my eyes.
"The first time you walked into that hospital room I felt a tug towards you like a magnetic pull, from that point on it whenever you were in the room it felt right. I can't deny I don't have feelings for you so I won't leave you and I am willing to fight for us if you are" she says and let out a breath I didn't know I was holding her, I quickly embrace her feeling lighter that I have in weeks.
When we get back inside the castle we walk hand in hand I feel amazing I can't wait to get back to the hospital wing so we can start with the pictures and videos again.
We enter the great hall were I wrongly selected Kriss, I cringe for a moment America notices.
"What's wrong?" She asks.
"Nothing I just forgot to tell you how beautiful you look in that dress" I say.
"Oh thank you" she says we finally reach the end of the room but America stops and stands just underneath the door frame.
"Somethings wrong" she says.
"What do you mean?" I ask looking around the room.
"I don't know I just feel a bit strange" she says.
She starts walking again, I follow.
As we walk up the final staircase to the hospital wing she trips over her heels I grab onto her forearm and waist to stabilize her.
"I'm fine" she says looking at my worries eyes
We continue walking, we round the corner I see the doors to the hospital.
"It's alright we're almost at the hospital you can lay down in there" I say.
As soon as we cross over the threshold into the hospital America sways and she slams against a wall.
"America!" I say.
I see her eyes are slowly closing, I lightly slap her cheek and call out her name to keep her awake but she falls deeper and deeper into sleep.
"Someone help" I shout looking around for any nurses.
I see doctor Ava I quickly pick up Americas lifeless body and gently place her on a nearby gurney, Doctor Ava rushes over.
"What happened" she asks quickly while taking Americas pulse and calling other doctors and nurses over.
"I don't know she just fell near the door she said she felt like something was wrong" I say.
"Okay well we are going to see what we can do" she says looking into my stunned eyes.
I hear the other doctors saying things but nothing seems to be getting through I look ahead but my eyes don't focus on any piece of furniture or wall I just see blurry shapes as I pass by. I keep walking until certain words puncture through my dream state.
"We're losing her"