Say My Name

Chapter Eight

It was loud, very loud. Almost like snoring. I opened my eyes slowly, the bright light shining into my eyes, the same light I knew all too well. That familiar, nasty smell. The bright lights that always shined in my eyes. I was in the hospital once again. When I looked down, I could see my swollen wrists, clean and stitched. The further I looked down, my eyes caught on something. It was Zachary, sitting in a small chair, his head resting on the wall. He was knocked out, and snoring.

"Za... Zach." I groaned, his snoring becoming louder.

"ZACH!" I tried to scream, before he jolted up, looking at me with tired eyes. At first I guess he could not process that I was woke, but once he did, he was quick to jump up. He got up close, examining my face.

"I'm so sorry Audrey. I never should of left you. I'm so.. So sorry." He wailed, taking my hand and kissing it.

"It was not your fault..." I mumbled, pulling him up so I could kiss him. He kissed back softly, before pulling away, sadness in his eyes and vodka hidden in his breath.

"What happened between you and Stephanie?" He asked, my eyes looking down. I honestly did not want to talk about it. I did not want to let him know why I decided to slice my wrist. I didn't even want him to know that she was the reason I relapsed. But he is my boyfriend, and letting him know is important in creating a relationship that makes it easier to talk to each other.

"After you left.... She told me that it was a mistake ever deciding to be my friend. She said that she didn't want to have to deal with depressed people that ruin the day most of the time." I responded, my body going back to that numb feeling. Zachary sighed, giving me a hard state.

"Babe I'm so sorry. I didn't mean for this to happen." He said, apologizing for no reason once more.

"Zachary why was she so mad at you during the date?" I blurted, his eyes going blank. He sighed, about to respond before the hospital door flew open, a short, irritated man barging into my hospital room. I like to call him Mr. Irritated because every time I end up back in this shit hole, he's never happy to see me.

"Hello Audrey, how are you? Not good I assume." He sighed, sitting on the chair next to my bed.

"Nice to always see your sweet face." I snapped back sarcastically, his facial expression not changing.

"You know the drill, your vitals are fine, do you feel any dizziness?"

"No."

"Headaches?"

"A bit."

"Did you try to kill yourself yesterday night?" He asked, sending me into a little bit of a shock. This was one of the questions that could make or break whether you end up in a mental institution. Zachary's eyes trailed down to me, waiting for the response. I honestly did not intend on ending my life yesterday, or hurting myself to the point of ending up in the hospital, but you know. Funny how things work out.

"No. I did not try to end my life." I said, Zachary sighing loudly in relief.

"Are you sure Audrey? When your parents brought you in, and we examined the cuts, they were pretty suicidal looking wounds." He responded, writing on my health exams."

"No I didn't try to kill myself." I responded once again, my voice firm.

Mr. Irritated started at me with an unconvinced look, having to take my word as an answer.

"Then you can go home. Your parents gave you rights to leave. I suggest you go back to therapy for a few more months, maybe more than once a month. You don't want to fall back into bad habits Audrey. Mr Irritated said before leaving the room. Right when he left, I rolled my eyes, jumped up, and began running into the closet and grabbing my clothes. Zach's eyes widened before he gave me the weirdest sexual smile.

"Damn baby. Are you about to strip for me?" He asked, causing me to hit him lightly on the arm. He yelped, sitting on the bed before I started taking off my shirt, followed by pants. Once I was mostly undressed, I sat on Zachary's lap, pressing my chest against his. I kissed him slowly, before he scoffed, turning away.

"Stopppp. You're turning me on in a hospital room!" Zach whined, my eyes rolling.

"Come on babe! Let's get out of here, it's giving me bad memories." He then added, before I kissed him once more, this time, Zachary responding.

"When did you drink?" I asked in between kisses, his lips trailing off mine and going down my body.

"A couple of hours ago."

"Zachary what's going on with you? Why don't you tell me anything? Why won't you tell me what your problem with Steph is? Why won't you tell me when you're sad?" I groaned, his kissing becoming harder before he stopped, starting to tense up.

"Because. You need someone to be here with you more than I need someone right now." He responded, resting his head on my shoulder.

"Stephanie and I used to be really good friends. She dated Nico before, long time ago. When you date Nico, you're basically dating me too. I was as good as a friend to her as you are. But you know, when they broke up, Steph and I got into a big argument. Now she doesn't want to be apart of my life, yet she's okay with Nico to some extent. This is why I can't do anything right. I end up hurting everybody, which is why I hide my feelings to myself." He finally added, as I started running my fingers through his hair.

"Don't beat yourself up so hard. We are all human, we do the best we can. Steph is just hardheaded, considering it was easy for her to totally screw me over." I responded, getting off of him to put my clothes on.

"Are you sure it doesn't bother you though? Are you gonna be okay?" He asked, causing me to tense.

"I'll be fine baby."

"I don't believe you. So I'm going to stay over tonight, if that's alright with you. I already asked your parents." He said, my face turning red followed by a small smile.

"Okay baby." I whispered, wanting to kiss the hell out of him.

Okay.