His Help (BoyxBoy)

Chapter 14

I stared up at my bedrooms ceiling, still thinking about when Caspar kissed me at the park.

After we had kissed we had very little time to talk before the others came back so I didn't get to ask him why he did it but I knew now that he wanted to be more than friends as well and that was enough to keep me happy.

The thought of Caspar and me together was enough to send me grinning uncontrollably and I'm pretty sure if someone saw me right now they would send me to a mental hospital.

A soft knock came from my closed bed room door as I sat up on my bed, quickly masking any expression I'd had previously. "Come in." I said as calmly and normally as I could while I watched the door open slowly to reveal my mother peeking in warily.

"Could I talk to you for a minute?" She asked quietly as I quickly nodded, wondering what she could possibly want to talk about.

She carefully walked over to my bed as I put my knees up so she could sit next to me on the bed, her face looking rather concerned as she began to speak. "You've seemed to distance yourself lately." She started as I stayed quiet so that she could continue.

"I'm worried that you're getting a little too distant." She said after a slight pause, her gaze staying on her folded hands resting on her lap. "What do you mean?" I asked gently, not wanting to upset her when she seemed so fragile right now although I had no clue why. It seemed my parents were always telling me to get out and make new friends. So what was the problem?

"I mean Gavin that you seem to live in a completely different house these days, I can't even remember the last time we sat down and had a proper family dinner!" She said raising her voice slightly and I knew she was on the verge of having a breakdown.

"But I thought you wanted me to make friends?" I asked cautiously, testing to see if she would take my response as attitude or not.

"I do want you to make friends Gavin, don't get me wrong- but are you making friends or adopting a new family?" She asked so quietly that I barely heard her, my heart breaking as I saw how torn up she seemed about all of this.

"I'm not replacing you." I said sitting up straighter, my thoughts whirling as I thought about what it was like in her shoes, seeing her son spend almost all of his time with his friends. I'd always been given lots of freedom as a kid- considering I'd never wanted to leave my parents side in the big city but now I probably seemed to be breaking away from them so quickly.

"Are you really only friends with that boy Gavin? You're my son and I know you better than I know myself and the way you look at him isn't the way you look at your friends." She said wiping a stray tear from her face, her gaze still fixed on her lap- not meeting my eyes.

"Mom, I don't know what we are yet." I said truthfully as she wiped away another tear. "So it is true then? You do like him?" She said finally meeting my eyes and it felt like my heart was being torn in two.

"Yes." I said, my voice cracking as I waited for her response, waiting for her anger, waiting for her pain, waiting for her to tell me that I was a confused boy and needed help.

Instead she hugged me.

"I love you Gavin no matter what, don't you ever forget that." She said as I let my own tears fall, the weight of the world seemed to lift off my shoulders as I wrapped my arms around her, letting my mother comfort me like the child I was.

"I love you too mom." I said as I let relief wash over me, the knowledge that I wouldn't be thrown out of my home because of what gender I preferred finally dawning on me as I let more tears fall down my cheek.