Lightweight

Lightweight : Chapter Six

                    I opened my eyes to find myself still in the parking lot. I had a beastly headache, my stomach felt like it was deteriorating from the inside, and I just felt weak.

 I got up from the ground. I reached into my book bag and pulled out my phone.

 4:30.

 I was sure my mom wasn't worried about where I was because this was the usual time I got on the bus from school. I slowly got up off the floor, cleaned off my pants and dragged myself home.

My mom in the same spot I saw her in this morning. This had really hit her, hard.

I just went straight upstairs, not to bother her in her own thoughts, and went up to the rooftop.

I walked out from the door and over to the railing. I climbed over the pole and sat steadily on top of it. This time I was sure I wanted to jump. I slid myself onto the edge and closed my eyes. I imaged that if I jumped off somebody, anybody, would catch me. But I was brought back to reality when I realized no one actually cared enough. I wanted to jump though. But for some reason, something was holding me back. I’m afraid. I don’t want to die, and I don’t want to live.

I saw Frenzy stomping down the street, her hair slapping her face. I slipped back over the railing and ran downstairs. As I got there the doorbell rang, I opened it.

“Y’know, I’m actually really sick and tired of having to pick up after all the messes you make,”

I looked to the ground and looked back up at her.

“I got suspended for lying for you,” She clenched her jaw together. “You know how  many detentions I’ve had covering for you?”

“Frenzy, I-im sorry, I was just having a hard time today you know that,”

“And I don’t care. I’m tired of picking up your slack,”

I swallowed hard. “I’m sorry I just-“

“You know what the worst part of this whole thing is?” She folded her arms, bit her lip and looked me straight in the eyes. “We’re supposed to be best friends and I don’t even know you. I don’t think you even know who you are either. And do believe the rumors about you and Ayden because I don’t know what’s true or not about you,”

“That’s not true! You know a lot about me,”

“Like what?! Your favorite color is green and you like turtles? Who gives a rat’s ass?! I’m supposed to know your inner most personal thoughts. You even had a hard time telling me you were even going out with Ayden,”

“But I still told you, I don’t get what your damage is,”

“My damage is that not only are you a liar, scum and a slut but you’ve been posing as this person, that’s not even you, fooling everybody. Get your life together,” She pulled out a stack of papers from her bag and flung them at me. “Have fun with these,” And she walked away from my porch.

I bent down and grabbed one of the papers from the floor. They were Anti-Sydney flyers. Calling me a depressed slut and listing lies about ‘how many boys I’ve slept with’ and who they were. Scott and Coery were on that list.

I was going to puke.

I ran up the stair and into the bathroom. I held my head over the sink and this pink-ish pale-ish liquid squirted out my mouth and into the sink. I stood there staring at my vomit in the sink, but it started to blur. My head and legs were become weak and my sight was unfocused. That’s when my eyes closed and my head slammed on the floor.

"Sydney! Sydney! Oh my god Sydney, please wake up, please,” It was my mom’s voice.

I flicked my eyes open and looked at my mom.

“Oh my god,” She grabbed onto me and hugged me tight. “Please don’t scare me like that ever again, not now,” Her tears soaked into my clothing. “You need to eat something,” She helped me up and we went down the stairs into the kitchen.

I sat down at island and laid my head on the counter.

“I’m sorry I scared you mom,” I mumbled. I could hardly talk.

“It’s okay, just eat please,” She placed a bowl of pasta in front of me. “I’ll be back,” She said as the phone rang.

I sighed.

I picked up the fork and began to poke at the pasta. I put some into my mouth. The first two spoons went down smoothly, but the third one made me sick. I pushed the bowl back. I was going to throw up again, but I swallowed it.

I grabbed the bowl, put the pasta it in the garbage disposal in the sink and left the bowl there.

I slowly walked upstairs and into my room. I sat on my bed. My headache had come back.

That’s when I thought about Scott.

I texted him:                                                                                                                                                   

You were right. I should've listened to you. I'm really really sorry Scott. Please reply when you get this.

I took a long deep breathe.

That was the only moment, in a long time, that I was happy with living.

I laid in fetal position on my bed and closed my eye to sleep when my mom walked back into the room. "Sydney! What's this?!" I shot open my eyes. She had the flyers in her hand. "I just found a bunch of these on the porch, who were you talking to at the door?!" She yelled as I got up and walked toward her.

"J-just leave me alone! Leave me alone!" I hollered. I grabbed some of the papers out of her hand and the rest fell out of her hand. I dropped to the floor and scrambled to pick them up. "It’s none of your business! I can take care of it!" Tears were dropping out of my eyes like fireworks. I didn’t know what I was doing. I just wanted to get rid of them. I didn’t want to see them. I actually looked like a madman; as if I was crazy.

“Sydney,” She got to the ground and grabbed me. “I’m sorry,” I buried my head into her chest and cried like a little child. She cradled me in her arms and whispered “Everything’s going to be alright,” Over and over again. And in her arms, I felt like it was true. Things were going to be alright.