crush // c.d

excuse me?

i dont want to go back to school, i cant. i have to though. i got up and took a shower and let my hair air dry i brushed my teeth and put a little bit of make up. i changed in to my clothes, i grabbed my phone and bag, i walked down stairs to see jack eating cereal. i waved at him and he waved back. i put my hair in a messy bun today. i didnt want to do anything fancy.

"jack are you going with me or in your car?" i asked. "ill go with you." he said. i nodded in response. i grab my keys and walked to the door. i walk to my car and so does jack. i started to drive but thats when jack scared me. "lilly what did you do yesterday!! did you hurt your self!?" he said pointing to my arm. "jack i just couldnt handle anymore." i said almost crying. "please just never do it again, go inside and get a sweater i dont want anyone bothering you because of it." he hugged me. i nodded. i get put the car and jog inside and get my gray Nike sweater. i jog back to the car, its only 6:50 we have time.

jack and i arrive at school, we walk in together. he goes were we always meet, but i didnt. "lilly where are you going?" he asked. "um to my teacher i have ask about the work." i lied. "okay but come back before the bell rings." he said. i nodded. i walked away, i wasnt going to my teachers. i wanted to go outside to the schools garden. yes we are allowed to, only before the bell rings. i walk there and i sat down on the chair. i just need time to think. will they forgive me? will they ever talk to me? i kept asking myself questions. I decided to walk back over there. its 7:03 i have plenty of time to work this out.

when i walk back over there, they all notice me. i say hi to everyone and hugged cam. "where is the work the teachers gave you?" jack asked. "uh in my bookbag." i lied again. "okay the only reason why im here is because i need to speak to Any, Tammy, and kattie. the reason why i havent been talking to you guys or hanging out with you guys, is because i always have to text you guys to remind you about our plans. i didnt bother to text you guys because I thought since y'all are my bestfriends you'd actually take your time and text me or even bother to ask how i am." i said getting pissed. they all looked shocked. "we dont need to text first because we dont need you! you always brought us down! whenever we wanted to go to a party you didnt want to go! you only care about yourself how does cameron even like a bitch like you." tammy said. i stood there shocked. she just called me a bitch. "excuse me? im the bitch? your the one who told me to stop being a spoiled rich girl! i stopped being like that a long time ago. ive changed! now your blamming me for being the way i am now?" i said. now everyone was looking. "just shut the fuck up lilly." any said. "no any because you were my best friend but you stopped liking me as a friend because tammy stopped!" i said. thats when any smacked me. "did you just smack me?" I questioned. i smacked her back but harder. then i feel someone pull my hair. i turn around to see kattie doing it. i pushed her to the ground. then tammy punched me. mayrin helped me, she started hitting any really hard. i pushed tammy a couple times. by now were on the floor hitting each other. while the boys tried stopping us and everyone else is recording. i got pulled away by cameron and matt pulled mayrin away. kattie, any, tammy were just left on the floor. even hayes and taylor didnt help them.

we got sent to the principals office.
"what happened out there?! i didn't know you guys would be the ones to fight you guys are bestfriends!" Mr Clark said (the principal). "ex bestfriends." i said glaring at them except mayrin. "you guys have really good grades, so i wont put this in your records but you guys are suspended for five days." he said. i sighed loudly. "you may leave now, not to class but home. i will call your parents." he said. honestly my mom wouldnt care she knows how i can get.

i walk out with mayrin. "you need a ride?" i asked her. "yeah matt was my ride." she chuckled. "thanks for helping me mayrin, but you shoudnt have. i didnt want you to get in trouble." i sighed. "its okay its what bestfriends are for!" she smiled.

i dropped her off and drove home. i get home to see my mom sitting in the couch. "explain" she said. so i told her everything. "lilly as a mother i should punish you but i know how good you are in school and this is your first fight. this is a warning okay?" she said. "fine can i go back to sleep?" I laughed. "sure hun" my mom said.

i go upstairs and laid on my bed. cameron texted me.

Cameron❤️: hey babe, did you get in trouble? what your mom say?
Lilly: were suspended for five days, and she said since this is my first time getting in trouble, she said its a warning
cameron❤️: are we allowed to hang out still?
lilly: of course 😊
cameron: alright babe, gotta go ill see you later

I responded okay, then I texted mayrin.

lilly: did you get in trouble?
mayrin: nah my parents said if i do it again then I'll get in trouble.
lilly: my mom said its a warning. lol
mayrin: well i gotta shower so text me later!
lilly: okay!

i took a short nap. i woke up at 12:30, i didnt mean to sleep for so long. i grab my phone too see a lot of Twitter notifications.

@thatssoany: im glad i got suspended for five days, it was worth fighting that bitch.

@omgtammy: same @thatssoany

@kattieokay: before anyone says anything. yes me, Any, Tammy got in a fight with @lillygilinsky.

I decided to tweet.
@lillygilinsky: thanks kattie for remembering to @ me, instead the fake ones didnt. if you have shit to say, text me or say it face to face. be direct. 

all my fans and followers were apparently on my side. someone posted the video and it was from the beginning. when I confronted them land then any smacking to everything. I decided to tweet again.

@lillygilinsky: thanks to everyone that supports me. i love you guys xx