The life of Amanda Rae

Suicide? #7

"Mommy!" I smile brightly.

"Yes?" She says.

"Look at what Tammy and I made! She helped me make bracelets!" I say, showing her the purple and pink fabric that's across my left wrist, beaded with bright pink diamonds.

"Awe sweetie, they're beautiful!" Mommy says in awe.

"Mommy!" Tammy exclaims

"Yes dear?"

"Mandy and I made you one too!" Tammy's 7 year old self says.

She pulls out a beautiful and extravagant tie dye bracelet that's beaded with purple and pink fake diamonds.

Mommy gasp.

"Oh my girls. it's beautiful, just like the both of you"

We both run up to mommy and hug her tight.

"We love you Mommy!" Tammy and I say in unision.

"I love you too my beautiful angel's" she kisses our cheek, and both of our smiles couldn't get any bigger.

"Mommy" I open my eyes wide and stare at the white ceiling. A million things running through my mind, different memories taking over my mind.

"Tammy!" I yell grumply.

"What do you want Amanda" she hollers back at me.

"You took the last vanilla yogurt you nut ball! I wanted the last one!"

"But I didn't take it Mandy!"

"Then who did!" Tammy comes down the stairs and we both look through the fridge again.

"I also wanted the last yogurt Amanda! Who stole our yogurt!"

"This is a mystery that must be solved!" We both smile and look at each other.

We walk into the dining room and we hear a spoon scraping against plastic.

"Tammy" I whisper yell.

"Yes?"

"I hear something!"

We both hear footsteps and we barge into the dining room.

"Aha!" we both yell at the same, and at that moment, daddy was eating the last vanilla yogurt.

"You stole our yogurt!" we both say.

Daddy has a horrified expression on his face.

"oh this?? spshh noooo" he tries to laugh it off.

"You did too! It's in your hand!" and Tammy and I both tackle daddy.

"Tammy" My heart feels a sting. It has been two weeks since my mother's death.

They say it was a murder.

But it looked more like a suicide.

I haven't cried since that day.

I have ran out of tears.

My dad hasn't been home lately. He has been working non-stop. He has currently been out of state for work.

Patrick checks up on me every hour.

"Hey" he says.

I look at him and then back up at the white ceiling.

"You hungry?"

I look at him and nod my head no, and continue looking at the white ceiling.

I hear him sigh and I feel the bed dip down.

"enjoying the ceiling?" He calmly says.

I didn't respond.

"Come on, get up. We're going out"

I didn't respond. I keep looking at the ceiling.

"Amanda, I know you can hear me. But now, you can't keep being like this. I know that you're grieving, I know that you're in pain. I know you hate this feeling of loss. But you can't keep being like this. You're better than this. You are strong. Embrace it. Yes you are depressed but--"

I cut him off.

"I'm not depressed, If anything I'm angry" I say it with anger dripping from my tone.

"Why are you angry Amanda?" He says shocked.

"Somebody killed Tammy. Three years later, Somebody kills my mother. I want to know who killed Tammy and who killed my mother. Who's next? You? My father? The neighbor next door?" I don't even recognize myself anymore from what I just said.

"I don't want to feel abandoned. I don't want anyone else killed. I want a happy life, but somebody must hate my family so much to the point they want to kill my family. I want to find out who this is. I want them in Jail, I want them to rot in a jail cell, I want them to burn in hell. I want them to suffer through what I'm suffering through."

Moments of silence.

Dead air.

"Amanda" He says.

"yes?"

"I'll help you find out who has been doing this. And I know exactly who can help me"

"Who?"