Bread-senpai Gets Stolen

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(Warning: The following oneshot is just a mockery of how I met two friends. Happy reading!)

There was once a senpai, oh so glorious, so magnificent, named Bread-senpai. She had a kouhai that she cares for very much, named Tsunde Remi.

One day, a random dude came. He claims that he spreads sorrow and darkness for fun. So, he decided to take Tsunde's senpai...

"Yo, I'mma take yo senpai, dawg." Random dude said.

"Ugh, weird n*gga." Tsunde said, as if saying that this random dude was flirting.

"Woah, you do not use that word. My goodness, you're way more evil than me." Random dude said, sitting on the grassy dirt.

"Weirdo." Tsunde said, flying away to her senpai.

W-what? Me? A weirdo? Me? The fu**ing prophet of sorrow? ... I'm going to BREAK you, literally, figuratively, and sexu- no, not the last one, nu-uh.

"Mga salitang kakaiba na onti lang makakaintindi!"  With that incantation, Bread-senpai disappeared in front of Tsunde.

"What the feck? Bread-senpai-senpai!!!!" Tsunde started crying and drawing animuu.

"Hmhmhahahah! I stole your senpai. She's MY senpai, now!" Laughing again, the random dude tried to listen to Tsunde's sobbing.

"... senpai, why u leave me? Now, I'm left with a random, flirting negerts (n*gga)..." Tsunde said, ignoring the random dude's cheering.

What's with this dudette? She's been effing with my pride since we met... n-no one.. no one makes fun of me..!

After hours of Tsunde's crying and the random dude's philosophical self-reflection with his life, he finally snapped.

"Hey, little girl." He said, having an idea to somehow live with this embarassment, or just something to do, as he is stripped of his own sanity and pride.

"Y-yes?" She asked, sniffing her sniffers, if you know what I mean... then please tell me, cause I don't understand a thing on how this story's still rolling.

"Would you like to go to an adventure with me to find Bread-senpai?" He said, holding his arms for the girl to take, hiding the machine-ball that contains Bread-senpai in his pocket with the other hand.

"No."

"U-uh, excuse me?"

"See this?" Tsunde asked, holding up the machine-ball that contains Bread-senpai.

"First, 'What??' Second, 'THE FUCK???' Alright, that's it." He pointed his 2 fingers at Tsunde like a gun. Potential energy, preparing to become kinetic energy that can blast through the hardest metal, works best on 4th walls.

He then pointed the Finger-Pistol to his head and said, "Sayonara.", committing suicide.

Tsunde Remi then unsealed the machine ball with her own psychic powers, revealing the person inside... the random dude.

"Hey little girl, would you like to go on an adventure?"

Tsunde was unconciously sent into a somewhat lucid limbo that.. I don't effing know anymore. Just use this as your base plot or something.

Get out.

(Alright, that's enough for you two. Let's make more oneshots about random stuff, shall we? ;D)

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