i'm dead | harry styles

chapter four

"So this is the night you show off what I'm missing." Matty stands at my bedroom door, making me turn away from the mirror. He's wearing a suit - except without the coat and tie. His white shirt is unbuttoned, showing some of his chest hair.

"What are you doing here?" I turn back my attention to my own reflection, struggling to put my necklace on. I see Matty who smiles a little and walks toward me to help me clasp my necklace. I push my hair to the side and try to avoid eye contact and warmth feelings.

"My parents donated 250k and your parents decided to honour them tonight, but I'm just here because I want to be with you."

"I meant what are you doing in my bedroom kind of question." I turn to face him after he clasps my necklace. "You shouldn't even be talking to me."

"I have all rights to speak to you. I see no restrainer orders, do you?" He says and I roll my eyes, crossing my arms against my front. He offers me a hand. "You need to greet your guests. Shall we go?"

"We can't pretend everything's okay."

"And I know that." He raises his hand a bit higher. "But please?"

I look up to the ceiling and exhale, giving in and accepting his hand. He helps me walk down the stairs, slowly and gentle. I shake hands with my guests, the same people I met last year. The same faces, the same music.

"Look how beautiful you two are." Matty's mother stands in our way.

"Hello, Moira." I greet, realising a second later that Matty hasn't told her about our breakup. I haven't told mine either anyway.

"Beautiful dress. Didn't know white was your colour, darling." Oh no, here she comes with marriage comments like she always do. Gladly, a guy walks up to us, interrupting us.

"I need to speak to you both... privately." The stranger says and I frown.

Moira looks at us all awkwardly before walking away. I tilt my head when Matty and the other guy high five, laughing.

"It worked." Matt snickers.

A butler walking with a tray of glasses of champagnes and Matty takes two one for me and one for himself.

"Told you I'm good, Matt."

"I told Louis to save us in case my mother embarrass us." He explains. "I know how much her wedding comments make you feel."

"Oh." I force a smile when Louis bows down as if he just said a full dramatic monologue on a stage and the crowd clapped loud and hard until they bled.

"Have you heard any news about Harry?" Matty takes a sip from his glass.

"Uh, no." Louis' playfulness washes away and becomes serious. "It's not the first time he tries to disappear but I hope this time he succeeds. He's just too much trouble."

"Well everyone told you, you're crazy to think you can move with that punk and try to make him a better and less weirder person."

"Oh come on. The guy looked like he needed help and a friend, so I tried. But he didn't let me though, he was always in his room and most of the time he wasn't even in the house."

"Where was he?" I ask.

"I have no clue." He shrugs, "I hope he's okay wherever he goes, though. Wish I could know where he's heading, but the less I know, the better."

"...whoever might be wanting to know where I am isn't bothering to look for me nor wants me back. Lesson of life."

I stay quiet hearing Harry's voice in my mind and I close my eyes, sighing. He was absolutely right.