The Rainbow Effect

Tests and Kids

The doctors appointment was nerve wracking. I couldn't seem to sit still as I waited for the my test results.

"Jasmine, it seems that you are diagnosed with stage 3 of Breast Cancer. There are a few possible steps you could take in attempt to fight it, but the chances are slim." The doctor explained. I made Lila wait outside, and I sat through his explanation of the steps I could take.

"Well doctor, with in the next week, I will be married. My spouse wants children, and I am worried I will not be able to birth a child. I am worried that I will not be around long enough for my fiancé. Is there any surgery I can go through to help?" I questioned.

"Well, I'm sure we could do a breast reduction surgery, in attempt to take the infected areas from the rest of your body, but you are so far along, that there's no promises that you would even make it out of surgery." He explained, a worried expression on his face. "Now, we could put you through the surgery, and pray you come out of it alive, but if you did survive, there is no telling how much longer you would be around."

"If I didn't go through the surgery, how much longer do you think I would have?" I asked, nervous.

"I'd say, without the surgery, you would have another year, if you are lucky." He told me.

"How much will the surgery cost?" I inquired.

"Let's see, for someone of your age and diagnose, about 15,000 dollars, and that isn't counting any tests, medication, or further visits."

"I see, well, I think I will need to converse with my fiancé first, before I make any final decisions." I said, and the doctor nodded in understanding.

"Well, I think you're done for today. You have 2 weeks to come up with a final answer. Any more questions?"

"No doctor. Thank you." I said, nodding and walking out of the door. Lila created me with a lung crushing hug.

"What did he say?" Lila questioned.

"He said I had stage 3, and that I could go through surgery." I said.

"Then do the surgery." Lila said.

"Wait, he said if I did the surgery, there is no promise that I will make it out of surgery, and if I did, there is no saying how much longer I will live." I explained.

"How much will it cost?" She asked.

"Around 15,000." I said.

"You have enough money for that."

"Yes I do, and he said if I didn't have the surgery, I would be around for another year. I have 2 weeks for a final answer." I explained, and Lila nodded in understanding.

"So what do you think is best?" She questioned, putting the key into the ignition.

"I want to stay around for the longest time I can." I said, my voice shaking.

"Then I think you should go through with the surgery." She said.

"Why? There isn't even a for sure of me making it through the surgery." I said.

"What can it hurt? If you live through it, the bad part will be cut away and you'll have a better chance of living longer." Lila said, and I nodded.

"But I will for sure be around for another year if I don't do it." I countered.

"I think you should do what you think is best." Lila told me, smiling.

"I don't need an answer now, let's just wait until after the wedding to decide." I said.

"Jasmine?" Lila whispered.

"Yes?" I asked, looking over at her.

"I want children." Lila said.

"There's no for sure on-"

"And I have a doctor appointment the day after the wedding to go and get a sperm insertion."

"And you didn't tell me?" I asked.

"I want kids, no matter if you're around, and I want to be able to bless you with a child before you go."

"What happens when I dye and I'm not around? The kid is going to have 1 parent."

"And? I am going to the appointment, and I plan on trying until I am blessed with a child. Jasmine, no matter if you're here for the child, or if you pass before the birth or after it, it will be an amazing story. I want a child, and Jasmine, I want you to be able to be the parent."

"I WON'T BE AROUND LONG ENOUGH TO MATTER TO THE CHILD!" I screamed.

"YOU WILL ALWAYS BE IN MY HEART JASMINE! EVEN AFTER YOUR DEATH! AND I AM WILLING TO SHARE THAT WITH OUR CHILD!" Lila screamed back. She pulled into the driveway, and I hopped out, slamming the door behind me.

"LILA, I UNDERSTAND THAT YOU WANT KIDS BUT YOU CAN'T DO THAT WITH ME DYING IN THE NEXT YEAR! WHAT IS THE CHILD GOING TO THINK?! ONLY HAVING ONE MOTHER WITH HIS OR HER OTHER MOTHER DEAD?! PLUS IT'LL BE MORE STRESS!" I screeched.

"JASMINE I AM HAVING A CHILD AND NO MATTER WHEN YOU PASS YOU WILL ALWAYS BE IN MY HEART AND IN THE CHILDS HEART!" She screamed back, and with that, she went upstairs. The door slammed behind her, and I decided to sleep downstairs on the couch.

Because no matter how much I wanted to run up there and apologize, my feet were not working tonight.