After

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October 25 2020

After I woke Liam still remained sat on the grey armchair, a cup of coffee in hand reading his copy of a novel whose title I could not quite make out. 
"Morning," he smiled, leaving the room quickly when his phone rang.

From the corridor I could hear hushed shouts, it was blurry. I couldn't quite make out who he was talking to or what he was saying.

He returned a couple of minutes later holding two coffee cups. The coffee was bitter, reminding me of the last time I had come here.

For Finn.

There was a quite knock at the door, a middle aged man appeared. His face familiar and comforting.
"Dad," I smiled as he wrapped his arms around me.
Liam left the room swiftly, allowing my dad to take a seat on the grey armchair.

"I brought some flowers. Peonies right?," my dad spoke, breaking the silence. I nodded, letting the bouquet settle on my lap.
"I'm sorry I didn't come sooner. I had only just got the message. I was terribly worried about you. I heard about Finn and was going to come up to see you sooner. I'm so sorry honey. " he looked a lot worse than the last time I had seen him. His forehead now coated with thin wrinkled. Bags rested under his eyes, expressing his tiredness.
"It's ok dad. You're here now. That's all that matters," I spoke reassuringly, gripping his hand for support.
Grief surrounded us like a cloud of smoke.
"You know when mum died. Have you ever got over missing her? Grieving." I questioned.
"The truth is, honey. Sometimes you have to accept that you can't have everything forever. Eventually, everyone dies. If you grieved over everyone who is dead there'd be no point living. Your whole life would be surrounded by guilt and grief. You need to appreciate someone's life. Appreciate that mum and Finn both lived happy lives. Let them remain in your heart but don't dwell on what could have happened if you had been there.
Today I thought I was going to lose you. You fell of a wall but the odds were in your favour. You survived. Maybe that was Finns way of helping you, who knows. But you survived, honey. Now live this life the best you can."
I smiled.

"Turns out I'm being discharged tomorrow. My injuries will get better but..."
"- come stay with me. In your home. I don't want you staying in some flat all by yourself. I want to spend the rest of the time I have left with my daughter, whom I love very much".

I agreed at once.
" there's something I have to do first though."

❉ ❥❃ ❂❁❀❉ ❥❃ ❂❁❀❉ ❥❃ ❂❁❀❉

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Thank you,

Louise💋

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